I-751 questions

I am in a dilemma. My spouse and I are having problems.We live in different states due to work related demands.This is the main cause of all our problems really.
Anyway, I am worried that we are headed for divorce. He is non communicative and I am sick of trying to keep the marriage together.
My question is what do I do when it is time to remove conditions of status?
I have looked at the document I-751 and the choices are either check the divorce or annulment box or claim hardship???? I do not want to divorce without working on the marriage.
I am hoping we will get it together by then but I need to know what to do if it doesn't work out!
Is there anyone else in a situation like this that can give me some advice.

What are the chances of claiming hardship. I just don't see that being a legitimate answer.

I am in a dilemma. My spouse and I are having problems.We live in different states due to work related demands.This is the main cause of all our problems really.
Anyway, I am worried that we are headed for divorce. He is non communicative and I am sick of trying to keep the marriage together.
My question is what do I do when it is time to remove conditions of status?
I have looked at the document I-751 and the choices are either check the divorce or annulment box or claim hardship???? I do not want to divorce without working on the marriage.
I am hoping we will get it together by then but I need to know what to do if it doesn't work out!
Is there anyone else in a situation like this that can give me some advice.

What are the chances of claiming hardship. I just don't see that being a legitimate answer.

If one is divorced before the time for "Removal of Conditions," one only needs to prove that, the marriage upon which his or her status was based was entered into in good faith by the conditional resident alien. So in the case that you are divorced and have to go to your interview to remove conditions, take all the documents that you can use to prove that your marriage in the first instance was a bona fide marriage entered by you in good faith.

Jesse, thanks for your reply. What happens if we are not living together and we are not divorced either?
What box will i check on the I-751???
One box says filing together. another says divorced or annulment and another says prove hardship. The other choices are irrelevant to me.
Could you help me with this question? Jesse ? any other suggestions would be appreciated.

Hi! I tried to post a reply earlier...I am not sure it actually made it on the discussion board. If you still need some advice, please feel free to write to me at jbrar@xmission.com or call me at (801) 269-9541.

i have an interview to remove my conditional residence in a couple of weeks with my spouse.
Can anybody tell me what to expect at the interview.Can anybody tell me there actual experience.
reply will be appreciated

Guest, if you are still married then you should be considered filing together as far as I can tell. You are afraid of heading towards a divorce, but don't want one, and may not end up getting one. It sounds like you are filing together. (I am not an expert in this area though).

Anyway, I would really like to recommend that you and your spouse get together for some counseling. I know that here as well as in a lot of countries, people often think that counseling is for "crazy" people. But it isn't, and it can really help.

You may also want to consider going on a marriage retreat weekend (either religious or non-religious) if you can. I have heard rumors that some of these retreat weekends can really help out.

Distance is hard, but don't give up on your relationship just yet. Try to focus on what you can do to keep it together, rather than what will happen if it falls apart, and maybe you will never need to think about if it falls apart.

Everyone that I have talked to that has been married for a long time says that some years are harder than others and that a marriage takes a good deal of work, and that they have a lot of ups and downs. But statistics also show that people who are married are happier and healthier in life... so if at all possible save this thing!!!! File together. Get together more often. Spend more time as friends (put fights off limits during these times). Distance makes you doubt things you wouldn't normally doubt and it makes it harder to work on things... but if you make your marriage a priority - you can save it!!!!

(By the way non-communicative is often a male trait that is used to try to avoid conflict. Not an indication of a lack of love or desire (trust me I know this is hard to believe, or deal with at times.) Give him space. State simply what your concerns are, but don't harp. When he does the right thing complement him, or reward him somehow, but don't punish him when he does the wrong thing - just make a constructive suggestion - i.e. why don't you come to visit this time? It would make me really happy and maybe I could take you to that baseball hall of fame that you have always wanted to go to (but I always thought would bore me to death.) You will find that he is eager for the rewards and will SLOWLY (don't expect this to happen overnight) begin to change.) It may sound degrading but it really isn't: you can train a person in much the same way you train a dog (ok rewards and punishments are different, but still!!)

Remember, just complaining without giving constructive suggestions and rewards only puts a negative slant on things, and gives him more reason to want to avoid conflict.

ok so maybe I have read one to many how to keep your marriage happy books, or had one to many psychology classes, but I think there is some truth to all of this... and it sounds like you still want this marriage, but are just tired.

Anyway, I know this is a immigration forum... so I am sorry for my rant! please forgive me.

oh yeah, I am not trying to suggest that it is all your job to fix this. But if the old method isn't working and you try a new one, maybe he will respond. If he still doesn't then you are no worse off then you are right now.

I am impressed Spouse! Nice work.

To guest:

Spouse really has given some great advice and suggestions. I do hope that you will consider this an option along with the other advice given on this thread. It really is good to keep an open mind.

Good Luck, guest, in what ever decision you take. I am sure you are going through some very tough, sad, and confused moments.

Just know, I will keep you in my prayers that God will guide you in the right direction.

God Bless!

thanks for not thinking I am crazy for writing this on an immigration forum one heart!!!

TO: GUEST,

It is not clear from yr post that when did you receive yr. temp residency since you need to wait almost 2 more yrs after that in order to remove the condition on yr temp.residency. If you think that you would not be able to stay in marriage and gets divorce before removing the condition, then you need to prove that it was not yr fault if marriage falled apart alongwith that you were married in a good faith, means yr marriage was a bonafide marriage and not for the purpose of green card. In addition, you also need to prove that you will face extreme hardship if you are not allowed to live here. If INS gets convinced of your reasoning, they will approve the p.residecy to you. My advise to you is that you should file for divorce first rather than your husband does, since it is important why marriage falls apart and by filing for divorce, you can control the allegations on the divorce complaint.


I must tell you that in any situation, do not let yr marriage be annulled because if yr marriage got annulled, then it means that there was never a valid marriage and if there was not a marriage then you were not entititled to temp. residency at first place. If ever INS find out that your this marriage got annulled then regardless how many yrs passed by(even 100 yrs) or even though you have become citizen in future, INS will revoke your p.residency/citizenship, prosecute you for this crime since according to them you lied to them about the legitimacy of the marriage, and will deport you, and then you will never be allowed to receive green card in any other way except thru applying for asylum. So, make sure that this marriage do not get annulled.

If time for removing the condition is nearby then i would suggust you try to stay in marriage for the sake of yr status and yr husband should not know about yr true motives. If not, pick up the option from above what i have told you.

Staying together is not a requirement in marriage types of cases, but then it would be very hard to convience the INS about the validity of this marriage since they would consider this as a green card marriage. Nevertheless, if the reason for living apart is work or study, then no problem in getting the green card.By the way, how long ago do you married? Do not check a divorce or annullment or hardship since these are not applicable in yr situation because you are still married, unless you got divorce then you need to check both divorce and hardship ones and if there is any abuse going on whether physical, mental or financial, then you can check that one also.

I must remind you that in each and every situation, you must need to submit lots of documentary evidence which are not hard to collect if you know how, even in the case of yr marriage. If you need further help, i can provide you but it is very hard and uncomfortable to me to give you that much detailed advise on the net over here, if you have email address then i can email you those information, if you want. Good luck.

I really appreciate all of your advice. Thank you especially to Spouse. I really will consider all of your advice carefully.
No I don't want a divorce but I am so hurt by my spouses reluctance to make an effort.I know that is not a reason to separate but at the same time how do I get my point across without conflict.

Thank you Spouse, one heart and Sammy for helping out and giving me hope!
Hopefully if I give him space he will become more communicative?!

Hi! I really do hope that it works out for you. Please keep us up to date. Give him some space... but if at all possible try to find a counslor or psychologist. A lot of people work with marital situations, and even if you can't persuade your husband to go to counseling, they can provide you with an outlet for your frustration and some tips specific to your situation.

(and just remember... guys have been socialized to have a very different communication style than women, so cut him some slack and try to figure out what he thinks is good communication - however strange it might appear)

My prayers are with you!