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  • Shady
    replied
    <BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Originally posted by dmartmar:
    <BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">I am my wife's second husband and I am a US citizen. My wife was caught coming in the country over ten years ago and was let go because she had her baby son with her. She applied for adjustment of status with her first husband back in 1997 but a deportation in absentia came out so they had to wait for a waiver. Waiting for this waiver took a long time and when it finally came, several domestic violence issues ocurred and they divorced. Now I entered into her life and applied on her behalf; when we showed up for the interview the I-130 was approved but she has 40 days to leave the country and the outlook for her little daughter who was born here in the US is like she will have to remain behind with her abusive father. Basically my family is being torn apart. What can I do? </div></BLOCKQUOTE>

    First of all, be glad she and her baby will be out of your life. Any foreign woman who mentions "prior marriage to a USC, baby and DV charges" should raise anyone's suspicions. And any woman, foreign or otherwise, who files DV charges against any man, husband or otherwise, would do so again if she had to.

    Make what you want out of my personal experience:

    1. Dated a foreign woman I met here in the US.

    2. Married her a year later.

    3. Wife abandoned me after 4 mos. of marriage and exactly a week from filing her AOS papers. Her reason for leaving me? Domestic violence, not true.

    4. No word from her in almost 3 months, until we coincidentally run into each other at a public gathering. I keep away, having nothing to talk to her about, but she sees me, comes over and (this was the extent of our conversation):

    Scum: ARE YOU GOING TO THE INTERVIEW WITH ME?
    Me: Are you going to let me smoke that stuff?
    Scum: YOU KNOW I DON'T DO DRUGS!
    Me: You know I don't do fraud!

    5. A month later she takes me to court for, yup, you guessed right, domestic violence charges, FALSE ONES!

    6. I beat her in court, she's ordered to leave.

    Now, if you don't know, DV is a way for a foreign woman to get a green card, W/O her husband.

    One option is to keep spending more of your money on her, w/o her spending a dime herself, which doesn't guarantee anything anyway, as your attys. said. Basically, take the risk. The fact that "it's not guaranteed" doesn't sound too promising. Just think about spending so much money and time, hoping this and hoping that, then she ends up having to leave anyway.

    The other option is to move with her to Ecuador. After all, she is the love of your life.

    And if you want to find out if she feels the same way about you, make her the proposal! </div></BLOCKQUOTE>

    Easier said than done

    Leave a comment:


  • sgo
    replied
    very good advice...

    Leave a comment:


  • dmartmar
    replied
    <BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">I am my wife's second husband and I am a US citizen. My wife was caught coming in the country over ten years ago and was let go because she had her baby son with her. She applied for adjustment of status with her first husband back in 1997 but a deportation in absentia came out so they had to wait for a waiver. Waiting for this waiver took a long time and when it finally came, several domestic violence issues ocurred and they divorced. Now I entered into her life and applied on her behalf; when we showed up for the interview the I-130 was approved but she has 40 days to leave the country and the outlook for her little daughter who was born here in the US is like she will have to remain behind with her abusive father. Basically my family is being torn apart. What can I do? </div></BLOCKQUOTE>

    First of all, be glad she and her baby will be out of your life. Any foreign woman who mentions "prior marriage to a USC, baby and DV charges" should raise anyone's suspicions. And any woman, foreign or otherwise, who files DV charges against any man, husband or otherwise, would do so again if she had to.

    Make what you want out of my personal experience:

    1. Dated a foreign woman I met here in the US.

    2. Married her a year later.

    3. Wife abandoned me after 4 mos. of marriage and exactly a week from filing her AOS papers. Her reason for leaving me? Domestic violence, not true.

    4. No word from her in almost 3 months, until we coincidentally run into each other at a public gathering. I keep away, having nothing to talk to her about, but she sees me, comes over and (this was the extent of our conversation):

    Scum: ARE YOU GOING TO THE INTERVIEW WITH ME?
    Me: Are you going to let me smoke that stuff?
    Scum: YOU KNOW I DON'T DO DRUGS!
    Me: You know I don't do fraud!

    5. A month later she takes me to court for, yup, you guessed right, domestic violence charges, FALSE ONES!

    6. I beat her in court, she's ordered to leave.

    Now, if you don't know, DV is a way for a foreign woman to get a green card, W/O her husband.

    One option is to keep spending more of your money on her, w/o her spending a dime herself, which doesn't guarantee anything anyway, as your attys. said. Basically, take the risk. The fact that "it's not guaranteed" doesn't sound too promising. Just think about spending so much money and time, hoping this and hoping that, then she ends up having to leave anyway.

    The other option is to move with her to Ecuador. After all, she is the love of your life.

    And if you want to find out if she feels the same way about you, make her the proposal!

    Leave a comment:


  • Marasmus
    replied
    Michael your advice to this naiver fellow is not complete.

    You should say 'this woman, her kids and her baggage'.

    Leave a comment:


  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Artus, you can make yourself miserable with this woman or get a new wife. Your choice man.

    Leave a comment:


  • Houston
    replied
    Please keep in mind that to apply for a "stay" of deportation, certain statutory conditions must be met. Also, there's time limits to apply for relief. You must consult with your attorney as soon as possible.

    Leave a comment:


  • Marasmus
    replied
    Well, Artrus, since you know that you dont want her to leave, now open your deep pockets to atone for her past indiscretions.

    If I were you, I would look at the issue of the 'stay' of the deportation order(s), plus consider proceeding with a motion to reconsider on the deportation order.

    But I gave you my idea that its always best to leave a woman BEFORE you have kids because after that you are tied to her. Just something to think about before you start this long journey of legalizing her and starting to live with her at great expense to you, all for her benefit!

    I know how blinding love is though, but once in a while you need to make decisions without any emotions.

    In any case, I guess you know her for about 3 years and now you are saying she is 'the love of your life'. Have you been alive for just 3 years?

    Dont forget that 4 years ago or so, someone else was saying the same thing about her-and it was another man.

    Leave a comment:


  • Artrus
    replied
    As logic as Marasmus comment sounds, this is the love of my life; and no, she does not want to leave for Ecuador, Would you? After ten years here, after having a daughter born here and a son who does not know of anything but his life and school and friends, after having a nice and comfortable life in suburbia? No, I love her to much to have it like that and I know her love for me is sincere after all we, have been together for three years. Her children look at me as a father figure and my son from a previous marriage looks at her as a mother figure.

    Leave a comment:


  • Houston
    replied
    You can file for a "stay" of the deportation if you have time, document the case and get relief for "abused women"!!!

    Leave a comment:


  • Houston
    replied
    The problem is for the I-212 waiver the spouse needs to depart, and those waivers take a LONG time to be processed. They are also hardship waivers and it's hardship for the U.S. citizen. Hard to prove hardship when he knows the lady for a very short time.

    Leave a comment:


  • Marasmus
    replied
    I think theres a way to get a waiver of that 10 year bar. Maybe thats what you need to find out about.

    Granted, you need to be ready to spend money on behalf of your wife.

    If she wants to return to Ecuador and you have not yet had kids, I would let her go and get another wife because you dont know whether she wants you so you can help her stay here.

    It seems she came into the marriage with too much and too serious baggage, which I would not trust she loves me for real.

    Leave a comment:


  • Artrus
    replied
    I did get a lawyer and if it wasn't for the lawyer being there, they would have deported her on the spot. Now, the lawyer says we have to extend the time of deportation but we first need to find such order and as I said, she was deported in absentia. Other lawyers are telling me that once she makes it down to Ecuador she will be barred from re-entry for up to ten years and also, at this point, after paying thousands of dollars in fees and lawyers I find myself in a bind.

    Leave a comment:


  • Houston
    replied
    Obviously he needs one, you can't file any motions with a court from a forum. But I guess he's looking for direction first, he seems nervous, that's natural.

    Leave a comment:


  • Marasmus
    replied
    You may need to get highly detailed advice that may need you to give up a lot in a public forum than may be advisable.

    Why dont you get a lawyer?

    Leave a comment:


  • Houston
    replied
    There's a program for women just like her. If she's married to you now, and the order of deportation is final you can file a motion to reopen but there's a time limit. Also, a stay of the deportation would help her apply for benefits under the program I mentioned. The only problem I see here is time, you only have so much time after the order becomes final to file for relief.
    Worst case scenario, you can use the I-212 and get her a K-1 under your sponsorship or a K-3 if you're already married.
    You should consult with an attorney. Contrary to what some folks said here, there's many services for a low cost, some free of charge. The NTA she received should have a list of such services.

    Leave a comment:

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