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  • Wish
    replied
    shayla get him to sign the I-751. The main reason is because you are LEGALLY married. After the divorce comes through then you file on your own with divorce decree with out his signature.
    You just need to see him this one time and that is it to sign the first I-751. That will give you one year extension and at the same time you can work on getting a divorce. If a second interview letter comes this is when you are going to need an attorney and request Immigration to wait until the divorce is finalized.

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  • Brahmin
    replied
    Men should try to understand women, and women should try to understand men. It is the harmony, peace and mutual love between men and women that brings happiness and peace to the family. People want happiness in the family, but they do not lead exemplary lives. The fault lies with both the husband and the wife. (Sri Sathya Sai Baba, Ladies Day Discourse, Nov. 19, 1995)

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  • shayla
    replied
    Hi everyone
    Thanks you for your replies. I really appreciate your help and time.
    I am not sure whether he is going to sign the I-751 or not, that is something that I have to figure out through my lawyer form him.
    I don't think I can live with im anymore. He lied to me for months while he was planning his leave and he chose the day that he knew I was not going to be home to do it. I am sorry but at this point I think that he is more my enemy than my friend. There was nothing wrong with out marriage, I was shocked when I got home and noticed that furniture and papers are missing. I was at shock for a few weeks before I came around. I will probably ask my lawyer to ask him whether he is going to sign the I-751 or not. I have no idea whether he will or not because after what he has done, I feel like he hates me for some reason. He was acting for months telling me he loves me and all and to be truthful to you if this is love, I am not sure whether I want to be loved anymore.
    if he does not sign the I-751, I guess I would have no choice but to go through the hassle of the immigration judge and all and see what happens. I will need a lawyer in this case. I heard from a lawyer that the immigration judge is much more fair than the immigration officers who deal with these cases. I guess the immigration judge has to extend my green card because my divorce has to be finalized anyay and this is for the sake of the USC I guess so after the divorce is finalized I will file the waiver.
    If he does sign the I-751, then I am not sure whether we can show up for the interview together ot not because we are either separated atthat time or divorced. I imagine if I am divorced I would just file the waiver myself but if we are separated and in divorce proceedings I am not sure whether it is right to go to the interview together. what do you think?

    I am so confused and frustrated......I feel like I am betrayed and used. I can't believe that he was planning to stab me in the back while I loved him so much......
    I just hope I can have the strength to go through all this mess.

    Shayla

    Leave a comment:


  • Brahmin
    replied
    Men should try to understand women, and women should try to understand men. It is the harmony, peace and mutual love between men and women that brings happiness and peace to the family. People want happiness in the family, but they do not lead exemplary lives. The fault lies with both the husband and the wife. (Sri Sathya Sai Baba, Ladies Day Discourse, Nov. 19, 1995)



    Women should take the correct path then men will follow suit, as it is the women who have to take the leading role. The wife is half of the husband; if she becomes good, then her husband, who is the other half, will also become good (Sri Sathya Sai Baba, Ladies Day Discourse, Nov. 19, 1995)



    Love is life for man and love is everything in this world. It is love that shines brilliantly in every individual. But man, not being able to comprehend the significance of love attributes physical relationship to it. The love of a mother towards her child is affection. The love that exists between wife and husband is infatuation. The love that exists among friends and relations is attachment. The love towards material objects is desire. Love in totality, directed towards God is known as devotion. (Sri Sathya Sai Baba, Guru Poornima Discourse, Aug. 3, 1999)



    Marriage means your whole life, a whole lifetime together, not just a few days, or a few weeks, or a few years. (Golden Age, pp. 140-143)

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  • Injoy
    replied
    Shayla,
    The answer to your question is Yes, but remeber that the time you'll spend waiting for an answer from the USCIS is too stressful and the process is costy, lawyers will charge you as much as they see you desperate. Remeber that you can get a final divorce in Las Vegas in 2 weeks, if you can keep things cool, it will be

    I would agree with wish on making things clear with your husband.

    Wish, I don't buy what lawyers say, I just don't trust them, a letter from the husband to the USCIS explaining the reson of not signing the petition is because she married him for the GC will end the argumnet, and the USC is always right if there is no proof of abuse!

    Cisse,
    That applies if she is the one who made the decision.

    Mamon,
    That memo came from the NSC and doesn't apply on all service centers.

    Leave a comment:


  • mamon
    replied
    I am sure all of you have good heartedly advising her to make him sign the papers. But you will be in trouble if there is an interview and you cannot show up with him. In fact, there is a memo that just came out from Immigration. It specifically states to let them know whether you are separated or not.

    Trying to lie to immigration might cost you a lot in the future, especially when you have a way out of this
    my 2cents
    mamon

    Leave a comment:


  • cisse
    replied
    Shayla, after all you have supported being with your hubby, you dont think you can use a little effort to stay with him until you get your papers? Why would you mess everything up at the last minute?

    Most marriages go through difficult times, but you have something at stake here. Open up your eyes and forget your ego. Try to compromise with your hubby. One thing for sure, there got to be something he's not pleased with (does not imply you are a bad person, maybe different interest). Ask yourself this question:

    Would you rather hold on your ego and go through all the mess that comes with it or just lets your ego sleep for now and have your immigration case finalized in less than a maximum of 2 years?

    What you may not realize is that the emotional distress that comes with such a situation maybe greather than putting up with your hubby (unless there is a physical abuse involved). In your place, I would think twice.

    One more think, have you considered to have a deep discussion with your huby? If he just left the way you explained and actually took the papers then he must be affraid that you will leave him as soon as you get your papers. Which could be reasonable to some extend. In that situation, maybe he needs a little reassurance. You love him or not, you need to fix the marriage for now. After the papers, both of you will have time to really deal with the marriage issues. If you dont fix the marriage, you will be just switching the problem from him to the legal system, which is financially and emotionally costly. Why would you do that?

    For the legal part, you are not required to live together to prove the bona fide marriage. Since you already have enough papers to prove that, just focuse one your goal for now. You will think of the marriage as a marriage later. But you need to stand up for yourself right not, not to switch problems around. You lived with him before and unless he's abusing you or you are beating him, you can still live with him or be in good relationship. Whaterver it humanly takes, go for it. Each situation has an end and once you reach the end of this one, you will be free to make a decision without fear our anxiety.

    Good luck.

    Leave a comment:


  • Wish
    replied
    btw it will be at least year before you hear from immigration. right now you will be in a limbo like all of us. there is no guarantee of anything. and do the good faith marriage because i do not think you are in any kind of hardship or if you are i do not know. hardship cases are hard to prove.

    Leave a comment:


  • Wish
    replied
    Dear Shayla this is my two cents.

    Since you are still married the I-751 asks you mainly if you are LEGALLY married. The answer to that question is YES. So in that case you would have to request signature of your husband and just let him know that this is for immigration procedure. File the document and everything that you guys had together (make sure you have copes) Let him know this will not affect him on anything. Its procedure.And its true-its your last stage.

    When your divorce is final and if you did not get your I-751 approved yet refile it again as a waiver for the bona fide marriage. along send copy of divorce decree and evidence you have been married to this man.
    You will be interviewed in this scenario most likely and when you do go to the office just give them the truth and all the evidence you have.

    *from one attorney i have talked to informed that if you are legally married the husband should be able to sign the documentation I751. argubly he could be trespassing the law if he does not sign it as he petitioned and sponsored you to be here.
    some people will disagree on this board.
    But this is my two cents.

    Leave a comment:


  • mamon
    replied
    Yes, you will get a "continuance" the Yates April 10 2003 memo clearly states that. There are ways to get around the "finalization of divorce". It is to file a "hardship" waiver which does not require final divorce. Then you amend to a good faith waiver.

    Again. You need to have an attorney on this case. Doing it on your own, might mess your case on procedural matter.

    Good Luck

    Leave a comment:


  • shayla
    replied
    Well, do you think the scenario I described in my previouse post will work. I mean when I get denial then I will get a chance to appear in front of the immigration judge and tell him that it was not my fault that I could not file joint. And then I can rpobabley get an extension untill I get a divorce and then file for a waiver.
    What I am saying is that there is probably some way for people who are separated to file without their spouse's signature.

    The other thing is if I only sign it myself and then send it in. it is going to take some time before they make a decision on it and deny it, by then I might actually get a divorce and file for it again using the waiver.
    Also even if my husband agrees to sign with me .. I don't thik we can go to the interview together because we both know we want a divorce......
    Please let me know what you think .....

    Shayla

    Leave a comment:


  • Injoy
    replied
    shayla,
    Complicated situations need brave decisions, I've been in the same situation, luckily, I got approved without interview, we're not here to give you an advice on how to fix your marital problems, but the first option that you have is to confront your husband with the immigration status, if you didn't get a serious positive response, go for the divorce immediately, to stay married and your husband refuse to sign the form will not help your immigration status, even if he signs and refuses to show up at the interview in case you are to be schedule for an interview will get you a denial.

    Leave a comment:


  • shayla
    replied
    Pasha,

    Well if I can't get him to sign it... then I guess I can just file for a waiver on my own. I know that it will be denied but at least until lit is denied I will have my green card extended and have permission to work. When it is denied as far as I know you can appear in front of the immigration judge and tell them that it was not your fault that you could not file jointly(in this case I am assuming that it is not my fault since we are separated at that time )and ask the judge to give you the chance to file after your divorce is complete. if teh jusdge agrees then he will extend your green card untill a decision is made on your I-751 case. Then I will file the waiver when I get my divorce and after that it will the same story as the people who had their divorce before filing for I-751 or filed jointly and then got a divorce.

    This is what I am thinking please let me know what you think.I mean I think there should be some way for people who have this separation problem and can't get their spouse's signature on the I-751 form.

    Shayla

    Leave a comment:


  • Pasha Patel
    replied
    Hi shayla...

    Sorry abt ur situation... you have to file for I 751 in November 2005 and u got married in October 2003 ... so after marriage u got the green card in maximum 3 months? ... that was pretty fast...usually AOS takes a while as per I read experiences...congrats tho...

    I will try to cover the things that I know from my experiences what I have read on this and other discussion boards...

    If he doesn't sign the papers then it is hard to delay the interview because I have read that people have filed joint petition and then applied for divorce and when the interview came they have requested immigration officer to wait until the divorce gets finalized ... but if he doesn't sign the I 751 and u cant apply for waiver then u r pretty much through... sorry to say that...

    There are 3 types of waivers.... Good faith / battered spouse and hardship waiver... for last 2 u don't require a divorce to file but u have to have strong proofs to file those waiver. The best option good faith waiver can be filed if the divorce has been finalized and u have the divorce decree... u will still need proofs to show that u entered the marriage with good faith and not to get immigration benefits only... like proof of staying together, mortgages, rent, joint tax papers etc etc.... hardship waivers are almost impossible to get success on...

    My advise to you is this... if it is impossible to get divorce without one year separation in state u live then talk to him calmly and if he agrees to sign ...that's the best bet for you...once u file the joint petition u can go for divorce process... coz I 751 will take a while too before ur turns come to be adjudicated... I have been waiting for more than a year now... once ur divorce is finalized...u file a new I 751 good faith waiver...but his signature will give u the time period u will need for ur divorce... if he doesn't agree then it will be hard may be next to impossible...I don't know what should be done in that situation... in one post there was a discussion about vegas divorce ... so try to read all the links that I m giving and find out if that works out for u to get a quick divorce... sorry I don't have time to do the search work...its in one of the links I have given...but then again he has to agree for divorce... otherwise u have to file battered spouse waiver if u have evidences and if u had been abused during the relationship.... Talk to him nicely and discuss the matter properly...

    If nothing works out then people will jump on me to give u this advice but if u happen to meet someone good for u...marry him and file for AOS based on other marriage...u will be asked lot of questions and u will have to prove the bonafide intent of second marriage...but from what I have read... people get success...

    As u have the green card now...u cant switch to H1B anymore that's what Sammy told me when I had problems with my marriage... coz u have already shown your immigration intent.... Try talking to lawyer if u can still switch to F1 if nothing works out for u.... wish u all the best...Pasha

    Visit this link...

    http://discuss.ilw.com/eve/forums/a/...01#53810238901

    Leave a comment:


  • shayla
    replied
    I don't know. I hope Pasha patel or Aguila answer this question... is it posiible to do this?

    Leave a comment:

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