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Micahel, what happened to your wife?

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  • #16
    If you didnt go to AOS interview he will not be allowed to stay. It is different than my case. I see nothing wrong with him bringing another woman into the homw. I think it is healthy competition for the women when the man has more than one woman. Did you ever make love to the other woman? I think that is very exciting.


    • #17
      No, I didn't go to the AOS interview with him. In fact, I don't even know when or if an appointment has been scheduled.

      I don't think he will be allowed to stay because he came in on a fiance visa and has been here for a short period of time, but he has no more respect for the laws of this country than he had for me. He will stay in the country illegally and continue to use people as long as he can.

      There is a lot wrong with bringing another woman into our home. Do you remember the marriage vowels? When you decide to marry you should be ready to devote all your affection to your spouse, if not then you should remain single.


      • #18
        Bigdummy, do not pay attention to Michael. His whole business is to bring innocent women from Russia, exploit them for few years and once they get their green card, he goes back to fish new ones.

        As for your marriage, I am sorry it did not work out. However, I am affraid that if you focus to much on the green card issue, you might fail to understand the true reason of the marriage breakdown. Not everyone in such a situation divorce because of the green card. If you do not pinpoint the root cause of the marriage failure, you might face the same disappointmnet again if you ever find another man and get married. Whatever the reason is, try to fix it. Assume that it was not the green card issue. If you come to the conlcusion green card was the only reason, then you can safely move on. But if you assume right the way green card was the issue, well you might find an american citizen and find yourself in a divorce proceeding again. You dont want that, do you?
        By the way, I am single and not looking for green card. Maybe we can hook up and have some fun. No promess for a marriage though. If we click, good. Give me your email and w'll take it from there.


        • #19
          Kumna and bigdumbo, which states are you in? Michael you are very funny.


          • #20

            Thank you for your response, this was much nicer than the previous posts. I have considered many possible reasons for the breakdown of my marriage and I am 99.9 % sure he just used me to get here. I will not say that I did not make mistakes, I did. However, I really believe if he loved me and wanted it to work he would have agreed to go to marriage counseling. I can't imagine how someone who marries with good intentions has another woman at home in less than a month. I failed to mention that he told her he only married me so he could come to the US.

            I am not obsessed with getting even or causing him problems. I just want to get on with my life. I know that eventually his lies will catch up with him.

            As far as your offer, no thank you. You don't trust woman and to me trust is the most important aspect of a relationship. Besides, I am not ready to even think about meeting another man right now. In time, when it is right someone will come my way. I do believe in fate and even though I have been hurt by my ex-husband we had a wonderful courtship and many good times together. I hope in time, I will be able to remember him and smile.


            • #21
              bigdummy, if AOS interview is scheduled and you don't show up, then his AOS process will be cancelled automatically and he has to leave this country. Either that or marry someone else and restart the process all over again. Thats all you need to know so you can start back with your life. Then again, its that what you really asking or are you just here to vent?


              • #22
                Uhm bigdummy,

                Well, good luck.


                • #23
                  Thank you.


                  • #24
                    Greate points SAMMY.

                    Even though you did not ask my explanation regarding my contradiction, I do want to throw it out here.

                    It's true, I hardly will trust any woman ever again. It's also true I love caucasian women. So I am hoping that, since I dont want to live lonely, I will find one caucasian woman that I can trust. No disrespect for other women, I just feel more confortable with caucasians. There is no hidden agenda or cause I am pushing for. I just want to live happily. I still have not divorced from my wife, but we are separated. Why? well, she threatened to sue me for alimony if I file for divorce. She wants to stay married until she graduates, that way I will keep paying for health insurance and other stuff. I figured, I would rather do that than go through the hassle of a nasty divorce. Hopefully, after her graduation in two years we will be able to go our separate ways in a peaceful manner.

                    Anyway, I got to go before I bring those memories back.


                    • #25

                      The longer you remain married, the most likely you'll become liable for alimony.

                      Additionaly all the property you get between now and your divorce, even if it is own your name it will belong to the matrimony as a whole and can be divided in your divorce proceedings if you are on a equitable distribution state.


                      • #26
                        However, statistics has shown that 95% immigrants marry to US citizen just to obtain LPR, but you will NEVER find any immigrant ever openly admitting of having malicious intent; instead they all claim furiously to be otherwise with all kind of BS. At the same time, it is also true that 99% American men marry foreign girls/women just for "other purposes" than being in love with them.

                        Where are these statistics?
                        The above is simply an opinion. Your mileage may vary. For immigration issues, please consult an immigration attorney.


                        • #27
                          Gees, this is going to be a lifelong battle.

                          I have given up. If after her graduation she still wants alimony, then I will file for divorce myself and let the judge decide. For now, I need a peace of mind. That's it.

                          Thank you for your advice Aguila. I am not used to this whole web of implications. For now, I will take a break from it. If I could, I would take a long vacation and go live in a very small village some where in Africa for 3 months. Life is extremely stressful in here.


                          • #28

                            Thank you for taking the time to write such a response, I really appreciate it. I am sorry for what happened to you. Regardles of the circumstances, it hurts to lose someone you love and I would think most adults can relate to that on many levels. I'm with sappyconifer on questioning the statistics you site. I don't consider myself any of those things, except vunerable and trusting. I guess I just believe if someone loves you then that person is going to be honest. I learned that if someone lies about loving you then it stands to reason that he will lie about many other things as well.

                            If you move to some small village in Africa you will not be able to find a woman to be comfortable with ust kidding. I can certainly appreciate the desire to run away from everyday stress as I often dream of doing that myself. However, I would run away to an island in Greece.


                            • #29

                              I guess I was just shocked at those high percentages. I wasn't calling you a liar. I tend to believe when people state something as a matter of fact, it is, but look what doing that got me I am trying to be more careful and question things more.


                              If you have your ten year green card, you should go ahead and divorce your wife. I for one would not want to date a married man even if he no longer lived with his wife.


                              • #30
                                Bigdummy, the divorce is going to happen. It's a question of time. When we were getting into the relationship, we were both smiling and if we are going to get out it, I would like to do it with a smile not with heart broken and anger. At this point, I have paid my share of emotional pain. For now, I just dont want to put her in financial difficulty as she is going to school and can barely afford to keep the same level of living when we were together. Additionally, by doing this, I am hoping that we can end our relationship and still stay friend. After all, I dont make friends to transform them into ennemies, otherwise there would not be any point to make friends in the first place.

                                As of now, I think she wont mind seeing me date other women since we have made it clear to each other that there is no romantic relationship between us.
                                If you want to date me, that's fine. If you dont, that's also fine. But for no reason I am going to make her life miserable because of another woman. Once she's back on her feet(after graduation), I will legally end the relationship and move on no matter what she says or does.


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