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Results 1 to 6 of 6

Thread: My situation ---Kind of long....looking for moral support here...

  1. #1
    Guest
    Now that I know there are some people on this board with diverse perspective and knowledge, rather than immigrant bashing I will share my story.
    My fiance is from Kosova, he is a veteran, and we have been together for 3 years, living apart, he in Italy, and me in Minnesota. We have a great lawyer, and I would recommend him to anyone with severe political strife in their significant others' homelands.
    He was injured in an accident at work that has left him in traction since September. I just got back recently from caring for him, ie..cooking, massaging his muscles, telling him everything will be ok, making him eat decent hot food rather than pizza delivery and the Italian equivalent of Little Debbie snack cakes, explaining to him the importance of Centrum ( good vitamins!) In the 12 days we spent in Spoleto Italy, the heart of Italy in the mountains, he gained about 10 lbs, which he has since lost since he has no one taking care of him. I am in law school, work 3 jobs, and am sending money to his family for their survival, since they live off the money my fiance sends them, and supplemental income to him so he can eat, and pay someone to grocery shop for him. The person I have doing this job is the girlfriend of his roommate. A Ukranian expat whose husband is back in the Ukraine taking care of their child. Believe you me...This is a difficult situation to say the least....In the meantime, our INS I129F petition is in process, very very late, at the NE service center. Its receipt date is July 18. It took us 2 years just to get him a passport from the UN because there is no government in Kosova.
    After being together for 3 years, and $40000 in expenses, travelling, telephone, and immigration fees and expenses, I look to the holidays and want to just cry. It is very frustrating, because both him and I are upstanding citizens, students, and people in general. The emotional, financial, and spiritual burden is almost too much to bear, yet, we know one day we'll be together, so we fight on. We are both human rights activists for political prisoners thru Amnesty International, yet respect all laws, Universal, Italian, and American. The only thing we don't agree on is music. I like Classical (because I play the harp and piano), and he likes Rap. But other than this, our life goals are the same. We are deeply in love. We have been there for each other all this time. We have been patiently, yet urgently waiting the OK to have his visa be ok'd, so we can get on with our lives, together, successfully, respectfully, and not as any kind of burden to American society.
    We had a benefit concert last weekend to raise funds to help him and his family survive the winter. Although I live in a mostly Democratic state, we were able to raise only $700, which will help his family and him at least thru December. The Senator that was helping us died in a plane crash in October, right before the election. ( Paul Wellstone). There is no government official in place to help us. So, what I am doing is getting the word out about my fiance. Unfortunately, I am also a recruiter during the day, and have a very difficult job in outside sales securing job orders from companies to help people find jobs, and there are really none available. I interview people, mostly Americans, who literally break down and cry in my office telling me they are desperate to find anything. The most desperate ones are the ones I try every day to find something for. The ones who come to me most often though, are those who have been in this country for a lengthy period of time, with MBA's, PHD's, and BA's, Bs's, and they are from other countries. Because of this, American companies, and people like Irene, immediately close the door on them, even for a $12 per hour job. My feelings of frustration are deep, yet I hang on, knowing this will change someday. The economy, and job outlook is not what it was 2 years ago. There is so much discrimination out there it makes me sick.
    Meanwhile, my fiance's work permit has expired in Italy, which means, he has to go get it renewed. They are not renewing work permits there, so he will be sent back to Kosova, which means another (at least) 12 month delay in his getting to the US. And that is if we are lucky, since he would have other life and death issues to deal with if he gets sent back there. He lives in a predominantly Muslim neighborhood, yet in spite of my warnings to him to be careful, he wears an American flag bandana on his head and a US Army jacket I lent him from my father, a Vietnam Vet. He wears these proudly and defends the US ( and George Bush) just like an American would. He is learning English on the laptop I was able to get for him, and wants to teach people about racial tolerance, his dream is his diploma so he can teach worldwide, this vision.
    Meanwhile, we wait.Our application should be reviewed here in the next few weeks or so, and he is asking me, from his bedridden room, when, when, when, and I can only say I dont know. It *****. I understand and respect the laws of the US. My family and I come from a long line of police, lawyers, and politicians, and I can tell you, family means nothing when the INS is concerned, You just have to bite the financial bullet, remind yourself that its worth it, and fend off immigrant haters and racists, and hang in there. So, that is what I am doing. After getting him here, we dont care how many times the INS checks on us, we'll make them dinner when they stop by! ....But I will be sure to move in a neighborhood that wont stone my husband for being raised a Muslim. Unless it's Irene's neighborhood. She is just trying to do what's right, but she needs a lesson in humanity, and THAT is my purpose on this planet.
    Anyhoo, That's all for tonight, any words of encouragement would be appreciated. Words of hate or anti-enlightenment will be ignored, but in all, I wish you goodnight wherever you may be.
    Goodnight
    - Concerned

  2. #2
    Guest
    Now that I know there are some people on this board with diverse perspective and knowledge, rather than immigrant bashing I will share my story.
    My fiance is from Kosova, he is a veteran, and we have been together for 3 years, living apart, he in Italy, and me in Minnesota. We have a great lawyer, and I would recommend him to anyone with severe political strife in their significant others' homelands.
    He was injured in an accident at work that has left him in traction since September. I just got back recently from caring for him, ie..cooking, massaging his muscles, telling him everything will be ok, making him eat decent hot food rather than pizza delivery and the Italian equivalent of Little Debbie snack cakes, explaining to him the importance of Centrum ( good vitamins!) In the 12 days we spent in Spoleto Italy, the heart of Italy in the mountains, he gained about 10 lbs, which he has since lost since he has no one taking care of him. I am in law school, work 3 jobs, and am sending money to his family for their survival, since they live off the money my fiance sends them, and supplemental income to him so he can eat, and pay someone to grocery shop for him. The person I have doing this job is the girlfriend of his roommate. A Ukranian expat whose husband is back in the Ukraine taking care of their child. Believe you me...This is a difficult situation to say the least....In the meantime, our INS I129F petition is in process, very very late, at the NE service center. Its receipt date is July 18. It took us 2 years just to get him a passport from the UN because there is no government in Kosova.
    After being together for 3 years, and $40000 in expenses, travelling, telephone, and immigration fees and expenses, I look to the holidays and want to just cry. It is very frustrating, because both him and I are upstanding citizens, students, and people in general. The emotional, financial, and spiritual burden is almost too much to bear, yet, we know one day we'll be together, so we fight on. We are both human rights activists for political prisoners thru Amnesty International, yet respect all laws, Universal, Italian, and American. The only thing we don't agree on is music. I like Classical (because I play the harp and piano), and he likes Rap. But other than this, our life goals are the same. We are deeply in love. We have been there for each other all this time. We have been patiently, yet urgently waiting the OK to have his visa be ok'd, so we can get on with our lives, together, successfully, respectfully, and not as any kind of burden to American society.
    We had a benefit concert last weekend to raise funds to help him and his family survive the winter. Although I live in a mostly Democratic state, we were able to raise only $700, which will help his family and him at least thru December. The Senator that was helping us died in a plane crash in October, right before the election. ( Paul Wellstone). There is no government official in place to help us. So, what I am doing is getting the word out about my fiance. Unfortunately, I am also a recruiter during the day, and have a very difficult job in outside sales securing job orders from companies to help people find jobs, and there are really none available. I interview people, mostly Americans, who literally break down and cry in my office telling me they are desperate to find anything. The most desperate ones are the ones I try every day to find something for. The ones who come to me most often though, are those who have been in this country for a lengthy period of time, with MBA's, PHD's, and BA's, Bs's, and they are from other countries. Because of this, American companies, and people like Irene, immediately close the door on them, even for a $12 per hour job. My feelings of frustration are deep, yet I hang on, knowing this will change someday. The economy, and job outlook is not what it was 2 years ago. There is so much discrimination out there it makes me sick.
    Meanwhile, my fiance's work permit has expired in Italy, which means, he has to go get it renewed. They are not renewing work permits there, so he will be sent back to Kosova, which means another (at least) 12 month delay in his getting to the US. And that is if we are lucky, since he would have other life and death issues to deal with if he gets sent back there. He lives in a predominantly Muslim neighborhood, yet in spite of my warnings to him to be careful, he wears an American flag bandana on his head and a US Army jacket I lent him from my father, a Vietnam Vet. He wears these proudly and defends the US ( and George Bush) just like an American would. He is learning English on the laptop I was able to get for him, and wants to teach people about racial tolerance, his dream is his diploma so he can teach worldwide, this vision.
    Meanwhile, we wait.Our application should be reviewed here in the next few weeks or so, and he is asking me, from his bedridden room, when, when, when, and I can only say I dont know. It *****. I understand and respect the laws of the US. My family and I come from a long line of police, lawyers, and politicians, and I can tell you, family means nothing when the INS is concerned, You just have to bite the financial bullet, remind yourself that its worth it, and fend off immigrant haters and racists, and hang in there. So, that is what I am doing. After getting him here, we dont care how many times the INS checks on us, we'll make them dinner when they stop by! ....But I will be sure to move in a neighborhood that wont stone my husband for being raised a Muslim. Unless it's Irene's neighborhood. She is just trying to do what's right, but she needs a lesson in humanity, and THAT is my purpose on this planet.
    Anyhoo, That's all for tonight, any words of encouragement would be appreciated. Words of hate or anti-enlightenment will be ignored, but in all, I wish you goodnight wherever you may be.
    Goodnight
    - Concerned

  3. #3
    Guest
    You are the best of Americans...No, the best of people, to do all you do for the person you love.....Good luck!!!
    XOXOX
    Cassie

  4. #4
    Guest
    That is amazing that you have been able handle all this. I think I would have given up on the whole kosovo thing....Is that Kosovo or Kosova/ Yugoslavia right?
    Anyway, Happy2bme is right...u rock lady

  5. #5
    Guest
    You and your fiancee are going through a lot and I wish you two the best!

    By the way, not all Muslims are automatically U.S.A. and Western haters: Muslims in former Jugoslavia (now Kosova) are being protected by Turkish troops (also a largely Muslim, but a secular nation). Turkey is also one of the strongest alies of the U.S., so I highly doubt (or hope so) that any Muslims or protecting armies there would punish or harrass your fiancee for wearing American flagged jackets and caps...

  6. #6
    Guest
    Thanks for the words of encouragement, actually he lives in a neighborhood predominantly N.African/Egyptian Muslim community who has chastised us in the past, ( Nothing bad has happened) but its cool he shows his support for the US. Likewise I drive around with my American flag sticker on my car and my Albanian flag too.
    ( I know, it's juvenile, but in a way still supportive)

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