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Thread: he was cheating on me since the time I met him

  1. #1
    I will try to make the long story short. I met an illegal immigrant. First I wasn't interested in him but he did not let me be and gradually, I fell in love with him. Then we married. Now there are three of us. I have discovered he is in a secret relationship with a married woman, exchanges emails with her, calls her, meets with her. At least untill I confronted him about this. I went on a business trip once and he stayed at home having fun with this woman, what I have discovered later.I love him but the more I think of it the more I want him out of my life. We have joint accounts, pictures, etc.
    But I also have the proof of his contiunous relationship with this woman plus some other things showing he was also interested in other women and men (!) while married with me. Will he get deported if proven no intentions of being faithul to me? Or having a child changes everything and he will be allowed to stay?

  2. #2
    I will try to make the long story short. I met an illegal immigrant. First I wasn't interested in him but he did not let me be and gradually, I fell in love with him. Then we married. Now there are three of us. I have discovered he is in a secret relationship with a married woman, exchanges emails with her, calls her, meets with her. At least untill I confronted him about this. I went on a business trip once and he stayed at home having fun with this woman, what I have discovered later.I love him but the more I think of it the more I want him out of my life. We have joint accounts, pictures, etc.
    But I also have the proof of his contiunous relationship with this woman plus some other things showing he was also interested in other women and men (!) while married with me. Will he get deported if proven no intentions of being faithul to me? Or having a child changes everything and he will be allowed to stay?

  3. #3
    Miram, your dirty laundry has nothing to do with green card. Cheating on you does not mean he married you for green card. Just he's married to you and is probably interested in getting GC does not guarantee he will control his leather. If his maniac like you put it, he would have done the same thing even if he was USC. So, instead of using USCIS to black male him, try to solve your issues with him. Is he really sick or is it that there is a deep whole in him that you cannot satisfy?

  4. #4
    Miran , I strongly sympatize with your situation. I know how it feels to discover that you have married a scum like that. I suggest strongly that you divorce him as soon as possible.

    I hope AIDS will take care of him soon.
    at

  5. #5
    I realize I'm being critical. BUT WHICH OF THE THREE PREVIOUS REPLIES IS THE MOST RIDICULOUS????????????????????

    Have you filed forms for AOS for him? The stage he is in in regards to Adjustment of Status if/when you get divorced helps to determine what will happen to him.

  6. #6
    What's up Miram? if he is illegal then u must have gone through I 601 before he could get anything regarding immigration.... if u havent then there is no issue regarding immigraiton....life goes on and u meet lot of j erks before u meet the real man...so kick him out...he will be still an illegal alien...Good luck...Pasha

  7. #7
    Miram,

    Revenge is not always the best solution. You cannot assume that his illegality is an explanatory variable of his cheating behavior. It's true some men are **** and it does not matter what situation they are in, they will still be ****. I am not advocating to help him get a green card nor am I advocating to divorce him. There are 3 possible reasons for this situations:

    1-He's really a ****:there is nothing you can do about that, he will always cheat on you. If you cannot handle it, divorce him.
    2-He used you for the green card: if you dont divorce him no, chances are he will after he gets his green card.
    3-He's not satisfied with the relationship: try to work things out. If this is the case and you succeed in getting him to speak about his feelings, you will learn more about yourself and about him. This would be helpful for your personal growth and eventual future relationships.

    By proceeding this way, you get a chance to learn how to avoid **** men or illegals who marry for green card or how to deal in a relationship.
    I would not suggest that you follow Someone12 advice since he has a different kind of aenda on this board.
    I dont think you should let people tell you whether or not you should divorce. I am giving you guidance as to how to proceed in taking your decision. The rest is up to your own judgement.

    One very important note: people who are saying "Divorce", wont even remember who you are in couple of weeks. Whatever you decide, you will have to deal with it accordingly. Dont you want to be in controle of a decision that will seriously affect your life?

    Hope this help.

    Kumna.

  8. #8
    Many people use the term "illegal" immigrant for aliens who are out of status or have been working without authorization, but who did enter the USA with appropriate documentation. If this alien entered without inspection, was not paroled or did not have a visa to enter, then he would encounter problems adjusting even if married to a US citizen. This thread does not specify. The possibilities are different, depending upon which is the case.
    The above is simply an opinion. Your mileage may vary. For immigration issues, please consult an immigration attorney.

  9. #9
    He already has the conditional GC. I know that there are men who will cheat on their wifes regardless of anything. But there is a difference between cheating with someone whom you meet once and then forget, and someone whom you know for years, have an affair with and have been or maybe still are in love with.
    Yes, I could divorce but then there is a problem that I will still have to let him to see our daughter. If he was deported this problem would not exist I guess. But what are the chances for him to be deported?
    I have been to his country and I know what did he achieve here that would never be able to get there. He wins everything by staying here- has a good job, dinner every day, house and understanding wife who always try to work the things out.

  10. #10
    and yes, he entered legally, but overstayed.

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