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British boy to US to finish education - how?

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  • British boy to US to finish education - how?

    I need advice on helping a (just) 17 year old boy in England who I want to get to the US to finish his education - both HS and college.

    He comes from a lower middle class London suburb, his father, who was an abusive drunk, committed suicide about 18 months ago, his mother's boyfriend and two children live with he and his mom, the boyfriend is also somewhat abusive and now his mother has told him that he has to pay rent, utilities and for food or he has to leave.

    He would have to drop out of school to stay there, where he's not wanted anyway.

    He would EAT UP an opportunity to have an American education and a chance to become something other than a factory worker with no HS (college for them) degree.

    I am the mother of a 16 year old girl, divorced and my exhusband and I remain very close. We live and work all within about 5 miles of each other, my daughter sees him everyday. We are not a "broken home/family" - we are simply just rearranged.

    This boy needs a father figure. He would reside with my X in the neighboring town so he and my girl wouldn't go to school together - could be too much for both and he deserves a chance to build his own independence. He would go to a stellar public HS in that town, live by the beach, experience being just a kid for a couple of years and finally attain some stability.

    He needs this to become a good man.

    We would be a "host" family - a "foster" family - whatever.....does anyone have ANY advice?

    MANY thanks - I need to start this ASAP as he's going to be homeless there and I can't stand the thought of it.

  • #2
    You need to get a private high school to enroll him and provide a Form I-20 so he can apply for an F-1 Student visa. No other way.

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    • #3
      Really? He HAS to go private? Do you know why?

      Thanks so much for your feedback - he's such a good kid and he needs a family - one that will STAY in his life.

      Also, I have heard that IF a child is put out after age 17 in the UK, he is automatically emancipated. Ever heard of that?

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      • #4
        Originally posted by madisonmom:
        Really? He HAS to go private? Do you know why?

        Thanks so much for your feedback - he's such a good kid and he needs a family - one that will STAY in his life.

        Also, I have heard that IF a child is put out after age 17 in the UK, he is automatically emancipated. Ever heard of that?
        In order for him to attend public school here in the US you would have to formally adopt him.
        “...I may condemn what you say, but I will give my life for that you may say it”! - Voltaire

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        • #5
          The F-1 Student visa is unavailable to students who attend public high schools. At age 17 you would not be able to adopt him in time to attend high school.

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          • #6
            Ah - ok. Thanks for the clarification on the private/pubic thing.

            That makes things much more complicated.

            However, there are some good private HS's around here that have great scholarship programs.

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            • #7
              Either he himself would have to qualify for an F1 visa or you would have to formally adopt him then apply for him to come here as your son. There's no such thing as a mentor visa.
              "What you see in the photograph isn't what you saw at the time. The real skill of photography is organized visual lying."

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              • #8
                such a goodie 2 shows, why don't you start giving such wonderful opportunities to your own people first? I wonder what's really behind all this. I suggest you get an unwanted boy from: the Ozarks, or some mining miserable town in W. VA or PA, anywhere from the South...should I keep going?

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                • #9
                  I KNOW this boy - he's a friend of my daughter's.

                  And, no - you shouldn't keep going.

                  This isn't some sort of "news thread" and trolling asses are not only unnecessary and classless but also arrogant and reportable.

                  BTW, what's a "goodie 2 shows"? See?

                  Move on - you're unnecessary here.

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                  • #10
                    As a Brit with a 16 yr old that lives in the US, I can tell you this, HS here is a different system and curriculum to what they have there.
                    I doubt he will be able to get in one anyway under F1 because of his age. Some States like mine, require that the child does his junior year in HS to be able to graduate, unless there is sufficient paperwork and grades etc from foreign school.

                    How well is he doing in HS over there? Has he got any qualifications? (GCSE)?

                    One of my younger brothers from London, did come over here as a student after he finished school in England. He also had a schloarship (sport).
                    He had to have a certain GPA and other requirements to get into college here. He went through a system where his qualifications (GCSE) was translated to the American system.
                    It was not easy.
                    He also had to do a year or more (can't remember) of American History.

                    He isn't losing out on a chance of further education or a good one, he can in England.

                    If he wants a better chance in coming to the US as a student, he would be better off getting as many qualifications as he can there first. Even if he goes to Tech college etc.
                    If he is 17 I gather he is in lower 6th form now or about to be? He is best to stay on school.

                    If his mother does throw him out, he will be able to get help. It isn't like the US.


                    For some reason as mentioned above, I feel there is more to this story. Is he a relative?
                    -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
                    God Bless America - God Bless Immigrants - God Bless Poor Misguided Souls Too

                    National Domestic Violence Hotline:
                    1.800.799.SAFE (7233) 1.800.787.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Originally posted by madisonmom:
                      I KNOW this boy - he's a friend of my daughter's.

                      And, no - you shouldn't keep going.

                      This isn't some sort of "news thread" and trolling asses are not only unnecessary and classless but also arrogant and reportable.

                      BTW, what's a "goodie 2 shows"? See?

                      Move on - you're unnecessary here.
                      Do you mind if I ask, have any of you met this boy in person and how long have you known him?
                      -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
                      God Bless America - God Bless Immigrants - God Bless Poor Misguided Souls Too

                      National Domestic Violence Hotline:
                      1.800.799.SAFE (7233) 1.800.787.

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Thanks for the thoughtful response.

                        There really isn't more to the story.

                        My daughter met him through a teen artists website about 2 years ago. He's very gifted musically and she's very gifted with photography.


                        They became fast friends but he was a typical teen boy and was raising a little hell. He had no father to speak of and a mother too busy with her bf, his kids, her daughter having a baby with her bf and the brother, in the service, having a baby with his gf.

                        He started flirting with her - innocent - it was/is required that I saw/see everything because I'm kinda like that about the internet_ - totally normal stuff ("I think you're really pretty", "I like your glasses", "you're really smart" - stuff like that).

                        She was gracious (was a freshman in HS at the time) but explained that she doesn't date at all and, when she can, she won't date boys who drink or smoke.

                        Then his dad committed suicide - she was a tremendous help to him. There was a note left and everyone in the family was allowed to read it but he was not. He could have really gone off the rails.

                        But, his friendship/pen-pal thing with my daughter apparently hit him because the next thing she knew, he was holding a letter up in front of the camera from his school, commenting on how happy they are to see the turn around, that his grades had all improved as well as attitude.

                        He'd quit drinking and smoking and started focusing on his music and school - he wanted her to be proud of him. He wanted SOMEONE to be proud of him.

                        It was then that she asked me to come meet him, as personally as it can get, via Skype.....both my X and I have sat and spoken with him many times, and I also have Facebook messaged with him (if my daughter wanted an account, either her father or I had to be a "friend" - hence the FB) as well as emailed.

                        His mother has refused to meet us or email with me, although I invited her into my home with this boy, should they want to come to the US to visit. I wanted her to be reassured that he would be safe.

                        So, that's the story - he's just a kid - some random kid that somehow made it into my life and my family's heart....my daughter's, mine and my X's.

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Well, he can come to visit. He can stay for 3 months without a visa. England belongs to the Visa Waiver countries. He can't work and can't go to school although.

                          Perhaps he can see if there is some student exchange program that he could participate....just a thought.
                          “...I may condemn what you say, but I will give my life for that you may say it”! - Voltaire

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                          • #14
                            I was thinking the same thing but when I heard that need to go to a private school, my heart sank.

                            We put our daughter through private middle school to prepare her because we have an award winning public HS here. I wanted her to learn HOW to study best and private was the best option. They wanted to skip her a grade and I wasn't for that.

                            I wonder of there isn't some way that, if he came over - he could take that time (3 mos) to study for her GED/British equivalent, apply to University here and qualify for his I 20 during that time.

                            He'd be pushing to graduate early.

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                            • #15
                              Sorry, meaning that THAT financial nut was cracked for those 4 years. Affording to put him through private school here would be difficult - likely to cost somewhere 'tween $25-30k a year - much like a college tuition.

                              It's frustrating because he could go to a great public school here and then we could plan and help him pay for college (university).

                              I know that he can get help in the UK if his mom kicks him out but that's not even the point. This kid needs a "family" that is consistent and stable - so he can grow into a good, contributing man. Maybe with that, he can help his OWN family heal.

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