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Josie jo? Separation?

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  • Josie jo? Separation?

    What happened? Mian left you? What did you do to him?

  • #2
    What happened? Mian left you? What did you do to him?

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    • #3
      Could you explain little more?
      God is geat

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      • #4
        This reminds me of "gapers block". Separation is not uncommon. I'm not at all curious of the details, but I have to admit I am somewhat interested in why John Doe wrote "what did you do to him?". It's interesting to see foibles at work.

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        • #5
          Swiss,
          I would be able answer to answer you if you decode the'gapers block' and the 'foibles'.

          I have no idea what that refers to.

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          • #6
            What I did to him, what he did to me, what we did to each other.

            We are not compatible. I made it clear he is not my soulmate and I will seek to find elsewhere.

            Also HOUNDS me about his PAPERS.

            He drove me right into a mental hospital over the weekend, and says he will put me right back in again.

            Isn't that enough?

            He left at his own free will. I took his key.

            I will not file anything. Just separation. I got totally used.
            Formerly Josephine Schmo

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            • #7
              JD:
              "gapers block" is a term used to describe traffic congestion, due to people slowing down to look at something. When I used to live in Chicago and commuted from the western suburbs to my office on Wacker, the trip would sometimes take more than an hour. Oddly, on these occassions it was often due to motorists slowing down to have a look at a car, with a flat tyre, on the side of the road.

              A "foible" is human idiosyncrasy, a mannerism or trait of a particular individual.

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              • #8
                Josie,
                Sorry to hear that. So will you help him get his papers? Marriage is kinda hard. Ppaers make it more hard for the USC coz the suspicion never ends that one is with you for papers. At some point that starts to eat into the marriage. Its like a catch 22.

                Swissnut, thanks for the explanation, but the reason I asked that was coz Josie put it as if the guy ran away from something. Thats why I asked that.

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                • #9
                  Hey Jo...

                  Sorry to hear about it...I m shocked... what happened? Did he totally leave the house or just went for couple of days in anger? So r u living by urself now? How was ur visit to hospital? What did doc tell u? keep in touch...if u need any help....Pasha

                  Good to see swiss on the board.... Happy holidays to everyone...Pasha

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                  • #10
                    No problem, JD. I don't know the details, nor do I need to. The reason I mentioned "foible" is that I still wonder what it is about the words "moved out" which gave you an impression that someone ran away. Could it not be entirely possible that it was a mutual decision?

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                    • #11
                      I see what you mean Swissnut,but my experience is that the person who leaves is the one who is the aggrieved.

                      If you live with a man as man and wife, arent chances to leave 50-50? So the one who leaves must have borne the greater brunt of the marriage failure than the one who stays. That was my reasoning and like any other reasoning, it can be faulted.

                      Josie Jo please take heart and know that exactly one year ago I went through what you went, but please dont accept a nervous breakdown for anyone else. You have one life to live, dont let anyone get to you that way. There are many of us good people out there and like we say where I come from 'if one man p-ees on the roadside doesnt mean all men are wont to do the same'.

                      And failure of any marriage is not the end of life. You will adjust a few things here and there but the long term prognosis of your life will be good. Dont get buoyed or bogged down by the short run outlook, as you adjust to singlehood. Just stick to your guns unless there is real change to the other side because if you return to an abusive environment like yours, you increase resilience to abuse and in the long term your confidence, health and esteem will suffer. Am getting the abuse aspect from your admission to a mental institution.

                      Good luck and keep us posted.

                      We are on your side.

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                      • #12
                        Jo,
                        That was bad news, to be in the hospital then to get separated is a tough situation, I wish you all the best, and i hope the separation period will give both of you the chance to think better, who knows, maybe that is going to help both of you to strengthen the relationship, I always belive that the normal relationship must have ups and downs, otherwise it is faked, I don't believe that true love means a word that you say every morning, it's not a flower to give to your spouse everyday, I can love my wife and get bored sometime, I can love and wish that my wife is out of town for a couple days to be with myself.

                        I really appreciate you stating that you're not going to file anything, and I hope you keep your word to the end.

                        Oh baby, Come here

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                        • #13
                          Interesting perspective, John Doe. In my case, my ex-husband left, but he was certainly not the one aggrieved. In his case, he left because he had accomplished that which he set out to gain. I think it varies dependent upon the situation and the persons involved.

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                          • #14
                            "There are many of us good people out there"
                            Where?

                            Not in So-Cal

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                            • #15
                              Dear All,

                              I am done with his foolishness and bullying.

                              I advised him to divorce me and file I-751 waiver.

                              Will answer you all after I get some rest, I haven't slept in 2 weeks and am drinking a Corona deuce to knock myself out.

                              I am fine, very happy the stress is gone. Too tired to enjoy or think though.

                              Love You All So Much! Muah! (kisses)
                              Formerly Josephine Schmo

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