quote:

Originally posted by nyc8177:
davdah, I have spoken to some of his family and we are all in agreement about the bond. His parents would sell a car quickly and get what they can for it in order to post bond, but we all feel like the money could be better spent otherwise. Namely, on an attorney if we're going to proceed with efforts to change status (and on an airplane ticket and start-up costs if he returns to Ecuador and has to re-start life there.)

The main concern is that he's in a rural spot in Georgia, removed from the world and I am in New York City. I understand that bond and a Change of Venue would make it easier for us to coordinate marriage and an attorney. Is there such a thing as a 'bond *****?' We just don't have any collateral to secure a surety bond.

Meanwhile, I haven't heard from him in 4 days...seems like he can't get a phone call out. I'm waiting for the phone to ring tomorrow (my birthday). We have SUCH a huge conversation to consider.

Throw in the towel and give up on everything now because it's just too hard/not worth it...or struggle through a huge, life-changing challenge out of real love and hopes for a future together? I know how I'm voting.

Just speaking to the phone call issue...
Is he trying to call your cell by chance? If so, he can't, not unless you purchase minutes in advance. You do this by calling the jail and finding out what prepay company they use (*Inmate calling solutions, PCS, etc.). Call the company and register your phone and telephone # and purchase time for him to call you. It will take 4 hours, but then you can receive his calls from him. Just a note, it's expensive and the calls are limited to 10 or 15 minutes at a time, but at least he can call you and you can talk. If he doesn't know your phone is up and working, MAYBE you can get a nice guard to pass him a message. If no nice guards exist, overnight him a message through fed ex with the message inside of it.

Very astute of you to pick up on that needfast

she can check website at
http://www.inmatecallingsolutions.com/


or call 888-506-8407 for 24 hour service.


unfortunatlely it appears to be scamming setup to make money with these high rates charged. but there seems to be no other way

Been there, done that!
Thanks 4now, 4now, lol
Before you sign up with Inmate calling solutions, call the jail first to ask what company they use.
Yes, they got boardwalk and park place!!It's ridiculous what they charge these poor people...but you must pass to get your 200...

Thanks for your suggestions, everybody. As you were typing, I was on the phone with him! I already have a phone account set up. (I was quick on the draw and set it up immediately on the first day he was detained.) It seems that there is an issue with it, though because he said he was trying to call and it wouldn't go through, so he had to wait to buy a phone card of his own.

We only got to talk for a few minutes, but he's aware of the 10yr. bar and is afraid we can't make bond. He was so resigned to taking a voluntary departure that the idea of "hurrying up," making a case, getting married and petitioning has his head swirling. His thoughts have just been so centered on returning to Ecuador and having to set up a new life there (with me possibly joining him after I graduate).

He is just so opposed to the idea of rushing to get married JUST because we "have" to. He thinks that our I-130 would be a looooooong shot and that it'd wind up putting too much pressure on me, my job and my schoolwork. I've already come to terms with how insane and difficult it would be, but I have to wait and see if he comes around.

We both prefer the idea of getting engaged and letting things progress more "naturally" as we plan a wedding, but his status just really doesn't lend to that being in our cards without sacrifice for 10 years.

Thank God that my mother is as close to me as she is and just spent the last 3 hours on the phone with me for my birthday, talking in depth about the different possibilities the future holds. All rests in God's hands. If my boyfriend loves me with the same love I have for him, we'll discover the right path.

nyc8177,

If you're using a cell phone you should speak with your carrier if there's an issue.

Thanks for your concern. My phone account is working fine now. I got to speak to him for over an hour on my birthday. He had arranged a group of balladeers and when I answered the phone, they serenaded me! I love this man!!!

nyc8177 - I've read the entire thread but I have nothing to contribute how to help you solve your problems except to express my admiration for your fortitude and resolve. I sincerely hope everything will work out for you.

Good luck.

Thank you, Verbalist (and other helpful folks, too)!

He still has no hearing scheduled, no attorney hired, etc.

He says he can't believe he's found a good woman to love him and is afraid he's going to wake up from the dream. (I'm no angel, but he insists I was sent from heaven.)

We talked quite a lot about how, when we first met, he was already making plans to leave the US and go back to Ecuador. He says that his heart is still telling him to "go home," but he can't deny that he loves me and has an opportunity to again change his life plan and pursue a new kind of future with me here.

Trying to keep up with and focus on my daily life in the meantime is just frustrating...

I know that most of you know what I mean.

dear trailer-dweller: if everything is "in God's hands" then why post anything? Why make phone calls? Why not do nothing and let "God do everything?" -- (of course, god will do nothing since god is not in charge of US immigration law, but no trailer-dwelling trash would understand that simple concept)..

there should be a law that states that one must have a triple-digit IQ before marrying an illegal alien...jsut think, with the enactment of that simple law, ALL marriage fraud would end.

Coming from one with a double-digit IQ at best, I don't think you're qualified to make this statement, S12.

157, last time I took a test....how about you, Proud (but dumb) USC? Ever break a 100? Doubt it.

Mine is higher - sorry to inform you. Mensa qualified, but don't want to join. Not my cup of tea.

I doubt that since mine is in the highest 1%...how about a game of chess, douchebag? Let's test your alleged "+157" IQ.....

dear ProudUSC...just a hint...chess uses 32 pieces that are shaped differently...I wouldn't want you to get confused with 'checkers..'

Chess is too slow, S12. I need something a little more challenging.

FELLOWSHIP and SUPPORT

Why are YOU posting on this site? Get some love in your life. Get off my thread.

Please listen to somoone who has been thru the process.Men and women every day in this country get married for green cards and citizenship. They will tell you all the nice words you want to hear and act like they love you when in reality they are" using" you for their own gain and the gain of their families.
After the wedding you will see their true colors. I have seen it in my own situation and many others. Listen to the voice of experience. I don't care what he and his family is telling you,none of it is true.He will leave you when it serves his purpose. And you may want out soon after you marry but he will not let you go,he will keep pulling you back in with his talk of love and he will keep you on a string until he is ready to walk away for good and he will want nothing to do with you.Then he will go to work getting family or an ex-wife that he will remarry and bring to the U.S.Keep a copy of this post and refer to it often thru out your marraige. I can recite the words they use,they will rage at you because they do not love you,their anger will only be shown to you,never to anyone outside,they will be the perfect husband to everyone you come in contact with and when you try to explain your situation they will think you are nuts.Don't do it.

jande, please go drown your sorrow elsewhere. Maybe you can find a young girl who doesn't know what love is and fell for a line from some guy who hasn't even grown up into a man yet. I am not going through "the process" like it seems you did. If it isn't love, it isn't real and there should be no wedding.

My boyfriend doesn't say "nice words" or "act" for anything. We're not talking about green cards. We're talking about being together. We're talking about getting married, period. We want a future.

jande34808, not all international romances turn demonic. There are plenty of home grown women who rank right up there with the best of the scammers.

Nyc, any luck yet?