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Originally posted by Sprint_girl07:
Davdah, don't forget there is also any Life insurance, pension, shares and all that too.
In a divorce she will be entitled to some of that. Not sure if your ex wife claimed any of it before, but best to sort those issues out while you are at it.

I totally see your point Davdah, but whatever you do, make sure you discuss this with your new wife as these kind of things might make her feel that you don't love her or trust her if you suddenly come up with a prenup.

Not necessarily. First it depends on whether one has whole or term life insurance. With whole life insurance, it will only be the equity if it is deemed community property. With term life insurance, it has no equity value, so no entitlement there unless the judge orders him to place the ex wife as a beneficiary. There is a Qualified Domestic Relations Order with pension. but judges usually don't resort to that unless there is no other alternative or if the ex spouse won by going after blood. Finally, with stocks, this only happens if the stock was acquired during marriage, not before, even with S Corp stock.

Hudson, I agree that different cultures do look at debt differently. Here its no big deal and is a part of life. In other countries its frowned upon. Our savings rate is beyond poor. I learned my lesson years ago about both. The rainy did come, more like a huricane. From then on I made it a point to never be in debt beyond what I had so I could pay everything off if I had to. Its worked wonderfully.

Ok, now I know what you mean about sacrafice. Her father is a minister and wasn't too happy to find out his daughter was living with someone prior to marriage. The issue of pride has come up a few times with different things. She has said sometimes you have to put your pride down. With age, I've asked about that. Her explanation has been she wants to be with someone who is more than she is. More meaning, more educated, more better off, more of a leader, etc. That usually comes with more age too.

I didn't take it as an insult about the insecurites thing, just being honest, no big deal.

Sprintgirl, it has been difficult to balance feelings with trust etc. in dealing with this. Bit by bit its coming together. Yes the X wanted half the 401 and the prior SEP retirement. But that was ok since I set up two of them from the get go. She got hers and I kept mine. Aside from the retirements it just galled me that she wanted so much to the point that she didn't care how it affected the kids. She was more concerned about the boyfriend. I didn't beleive it even though the lawyer warned me that it would probably go that way. He was right, it did.

I won't get life insurance. My X made a comment about that years ago that made my ears really perk up. She used to watch a lot of those crime mystery shows where the husband usually got ***ped off for the life insurance money. I decided it might be best if I stayed being worth more standing up than at room temperture.

quote:

Originally posted by davdah:
I won't get life insurance. My X made a comment about that years ago that made my ears really perk up. She used to watch a lot of those crime mystery shows where the husband usually got ***ped off for the life insurance money. I decided it might be best if I stayed being worth more standing up than at room temperture.

Well, given your equity situation, you may not need any life insurance; however, a lot of tax and estate law has changed over the last few years. You can get life insurance where the beneficiary is the child, wife, estate, or trust. In estate planning, you can create a life insurance trust. In this trust, you can set up the beneficiaries, distribution tables, etc as you see fit. You can even exclude or include current or ex spouses. Additionally, it saves you on estate taxes. This is something to consider considering that after 2010, the estate filing requirement will be $1 million. The estate will not only include all assets, but also life insurance policies and any reportable gifts.

Term insurance and whole insurance policies do have provisions where if the beneficiary murdered, used foul play, or other specific circumstances, on the benefactor (thats you), then the insurance will be denied or severely reduced to only pay for funeral costs. Your ex watched too many Matlock and Perry Mason shows. But you need to look at your equity and how well your spouse will handle the business or debts as well as how the property will be distributed once you pass away. I believe this is something og considerable importance if you are above the age of 50.

davdah, not to interfere with your discussion but there are financial advisers and attorneys who may help you chose the best course of actionfin.

Good luck

When it all comes to a head, soon, I'll probably end up seeing an accountant and lawyer. Like immigration, estate planning is a case by case basis. Blend it with immigration, what a mess. Ive heard about using insurance to cover estate and other taxes to insure the family gets everything in the event of demise. In the case of a business the tax rate given would be based on the value. The value to be determined by who? I would imagine it would be high and that would always cause problems having to part with a big chunk of money. If it can be set up to exclude 'foul' play that would be easier to swallow. That and making it go to cover taxes first before anyone gets a dime would be the smart bet.

She didn't watch matlock or mason, it was those newer shows, unsolved crimes or something along those lines. One reason I made it a point to never eat at home after things went bad. But jack n the box gets old after awhile (lol).

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you could arrange it so there is an electrical fire while she is sound asleep; give her a few drinks so she will be totally knocked out;makse sure the smoke detector batteries are old. do not make single vacation plans before you do it.

I remember one january cold evening in lonely Brooklyn bar, with a few local one dollar beer drinkers of the golden age to be polite. There was interesting sticker "i used to have drinking problem,now I love the stuff!"The same I feel about mister Sono.Keep going, pal! It's getting better!

quote:

Originally posted by davdah:
When it all comes to a head, soon, I'll probably end up seeing an accountant and lawyer. Like immigration, estate planning is a case by case basis. Blend it with immigration, what a mess. Ive heard about using insurance to cover estate and other taxes to insure the family gets everything in the event of demise. In the case of a business the tax rate given would be based on the value. The value to be determined by who? I would imagine it would be high and that would always cause problems having to part with a big chunk of money. If it can be set up to exclude 'foul' play that would be easier to swallow. That and making it go to cover taxes first before anyone gets a dime would be the smart bet.

She didn't watch matlock or mason, it was those newer shows, unsolved crimes or something along those lines. One reason I made it a point to never eat at home after things went bad. But jack n the box gets old after awhile (lol).

Well, you are doing the right thing by doing "research" with your prenuptial question. I will also agree that an attorney is recommended for the prenuptial. In estate planning, you can use a really good financial planner or a tax attorney. But estate planning is hard to do right now because of the tax law. The reason is that the estate tax, as currently written, is a monster. Depending on which year you pass away will depend slight on whether the estate tax will be imposed. Currently, if you pass away in 07 or 08, the gross estate has to be more than $2 million, in 2009, $3.5 million, in 2010, it goes away, and after 2010, it drops back at $1 million. Unless congress changes the law again, you have to go what is on the books right now.

All property will be determined by the fair market value at the time of your death, or using the alternative valuation method. Basically, an appraiser will come and make the calculations on the fair market value. Anything producing income after your death will go to the income tax return of the estate, form 1041. To give you the complexity of estate tax, the form 706, the death tax form, is 40 pages long. The instructions to the form is 30 pages. Form 1041 is 4 pages long with its instructions 45 pages.

Immigration is not a problem unless you or her have assets loated outside the US. There are estate tax treaties, much like income tax treaties. And if she is a resident alien for tax purposes, which means she is present in the US for a period of 183 days or more, then she is taxed like a USC. It does not matter, generally, whether she has a visa or not. But it can get dicey if you are dealing with nonresident aliens, let say a relative who lives abroad and is not a USC or resident alien.

As for the foul play and paying taxes, this amy be wise, but this is determined more by state law, not federal law when it comes to who has inheritance.