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quote: Originally posted by Aroha: The Phillips stuff is very interesting. I don't necessarily agree with all of it, though. The fit or fat thing actually irked me. LOL. I also believe that differences aren't a bad thing. J and I have differing opinions on politics and world events. He's far more religious than I am. We don't like all the same TV shows. Compromise. It's important. As is the odd screaming match to clear out the voicebox. 
Do all the good you can, in all the ways you can, as long as ever you can.
--John Wesley
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| Posts: 1504 | Location: Georgia | Registered: 12-22-2007 | |
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Just got to post this - a new member reminded me of this joke.  A couple had only been married for two weeks and the husband, although very much in love, couldn't wait to go out on the town and party with his old buddies. So, he said to his new wife, 'Honey, I'll be right back.' 'Where are you going, Coochy Coo?' asked the wife. 'I'm going to the bar, Pretty Face,' he answered. I'm going to have a beer.' The wife said, 'You want a beer, my love?' She opened the door to the refrigerator and showed him 25 different kinds of beer , brands from 12 different countries: Germany, Holland, Japan, India, etc The husband didn't know what to do, and the only thing that he could think of saying was, 'Yes, Lollipop... but at the bar... You know... they have frozen glasses... ' He didn't get to finish the sentence, because the wife interrupted him by saying, 'You want a frozen glass, Puppy Face?' She took a huge beer mug out of the freezer, so frozen that she was getting chills just holding it. The husband, looking a bit pale, said, 'Yes, Tootsie Roll, but at the bar they have those hors d'oeuvres that are really delicious... I won't be long. I'll be right back. I promise. OK?' 'You want hors d'oeuvres, Poochie Pooh?' She opened the oven and took out 5 dishes of different hors d'oeuvres: chicken wings, pigs in blankets, mushroom caps, and little quiches. 'But my sweet honey... at the bar.... you know there's swearing, dirty words and all that...' 'You want dirty words, Cutie Pie? LISTEN UP CHICKEN S.H.I.T.! SIT YOUR A.S.S. DOWN, SHUT THE HELL UP, DRINK YOUR BEER IN YOUR FROZEN MUG AND EAT YOUR HORS D'OEUVRES BECAUSE YOUR MARRIED *** ISN'T GOING TO A ****ED BAR! THAT S.H.I.T. IS OVER, GOT IT, JACKA.S.S.?' and...they lived happily ever after. Isn't that a sweet story?
Do all the good you can, in all the ways you can, as long as ever you can.
--John Wesley
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| Posts: 1504 | Location: Georgia | Registered: 12-22-2007 | |
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Power Member
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quote: Originally posted by Mrs. B.: Just got to post this - a new member reminded me of this joke. A couple had only been married for two weeks and the husband, although very much in love, couldn't wait to go out on the town and party with his old buddies. So, he said to his new wife, 'Honey, I'll be right back.' 'Where are you going, Coochy Coo?' asked the wife. 'I'm going to the bar, Pretty Face,' he answered. I'm going to have a beer.' The wife said, 'You want a beer, my love?' She opened the door to the refrigerator and showed him 25 different kinds of beer , brands from 12 different countries: Germany, Holland, Japan, India, etc The husband didn't know what to do, and the only thing that he could think of saying was, 'Yes, Lollipop... but at the bar... You know... they have frozen glasses... ' He didn't get to finish the sentence, because the wife interrupted him by saying, 'You want a frozen glass, Puppy Face?' She took a huge beer mug out of the freezer, so frozen that she was getting chills just holding it. The husband, looking a bit pale, said, 'Yes, Tootsie Roll, but at the bar they have those hors d'oeuvres that are really delicious... I won't be long. I'll be right back. I promise. OK?' 'You want hors d'oeuvres, Poochie Pooh?' She opened the oven and took out 5 dishes of different hors d'oeuvres: chicken wings, pigs in blankets, mushroom caps, and little quiches. 'But my sweet honey... at the bar.... you know there's swearing, dirty words and all that...' 'You want dirty words, Cutie Pie? LISTEN UP CHICKEN S.H.I.T.! SIT YOUR A.S.S. DOWN, SHUT THE HELL UP, DRINK YOUR BEER IN YOUR FROZEN MUG AND EAT YOUR HORS D'OEUVRES BECAUSE YOUR MARRIED *** ISN'T GOING TO A ****ED BAR! THAT S.H.I.T. IS OVER, GOT IT, JACKA.S.S.?' and...they lived happily ever after. Isn't that a sweet story?
LMAO, Mrs. B. Thanks for sharing. |
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quote: Just got to post this - a new member reminded me of this joke. Big Grin
A couple had only been married for two weeks and the husband, although very much in love, couldn't wait to go out on the town and party with his old buddies.
So, he said to his new wife, 'Honey, I'll be right back.' 'Where are you going, Coochy Coo?' asked the wife.
'I'm going to the bar, Pretty Face,' he answered. I'm going to have a beer.'
The wife said, 'You want a beer, my love?' She opened the door to the refrigerator and showed him 25 different kinds of beer , brands from 12 different countries: Germany, Holland, Japan, India, etc
The husband didn't know what to do, and the only thing that he could think of saying was, 'Yes, Lollipop... but at the bar... You know... they have frozen glasses... '
He didn't get to finish the sentence, because the wife interrupted him by saying, 'You want a frozen glass, Puppy Face?' She took a huge beer mug out of the freezer, so frozen that she was getting chills just holding it.
The husband, looking a bit pale, said, 'Yes, Tootsie Roll, but at the bar they have those hors d'oeuvres that are really delicious... I won't be long. I'll be right back. I promise. OK?'
'You want hors d'oeuvres, Poochie Pooh?' She opened the oven and
took out 5 dishes of different hors d'oeuvres: chicken wings, pigs in blankets, mushroom caps, and little quiches.
'But my sweet honey... at the bar.... you know there's swearing, dirty words and all that...'
'You want dirty words, Cutie Pie?
LISTEN UP CHICKEN S.H.I.T.! SIT YOUR A.S.S. DOWN, SHUT THE HELL UP, DRINK YOUR BEER IN YOUR FROZEN MUG AND EAT YOUR HORS D'OEUVRES BECAUSE YOUR MARRIED *** ISN'T GOING TO A ****ED BAR! THAT S.H.I.T. IS OVER, GOT IT, JACKA.S.S.?'
and...they lived happily ever after. Isn't that a sweet story?
Hmmm, I think that was me! 
We voted Democrat. They'll be no need to sneak in anymore
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quote: Originally posted by Mrs. B.: Just got to post this - a new member reminded me of this joke. A couple had only been married for two weeks and the husband, although very much in love, couldn't wait to go out on the town and party with his old buddies. So, he said to his new wife, 'Honey, I'll be right back.' 'Where are you going, Coochy Coo?' asked the wife. 'I'm going to the bar, Pretty Face,' he answered. I'm going to have a beer.' The wife said, 'You want a beer, my love?' She opened the door to the refrigerator and showed him 25 different kinds of beer , brands from 12 different countries: Germany, Holland, Japan, India, etc The husband didn't know what to do, and the only thing that he could think of saying was, 'Yes, Lollipop... but at the bar... You know... they have frozen glasses... ' He didn't get to finish the sentence, because the wife interrupted him by saying, 'You want a frozen glass, Puppy Face?' She took a huge beer mug out of the freezer, so frozen that she was getting chills just holding it. The husband, looking a bit pale, said, 'Yes, Tootsie Roll, but at the bar they have those hors d'oeuvres that are really delicious... I won't be long. I'll be right back. I promise. OK?' 'You want hors d'oeuvres, Poochie Pooh?' She opened the oven and took out 5 dishes of different hors d'oeuvres: chicken wings, pigs in blankets, mushroom caps, and little quiches. 'But my sweet honey... at the bar.... you know there's swearing, dirty words and all that...' 'You want dirty words, Cutie Pie? LISTEN UP CHICKEN S.H.I.T.! SIT YOUR A.S.S. DOWN, SHUT THE HELL UP, DRINK YOUR BEER IN YOUR FROZEN MUG AND EAT YOUR HORS D'OEUVRES BECAUSE YOUR MARRIED *** ISN'T GOING TO A ****ED BAR! THAT S.H.I.T. IS OVER, GOT IT, JACKA.S.S.?' and...they lived happily ever after. Isn't that a sweet story?
Good One! Hope You Dont Mind? I put a Copy on funny stuff thread. We Will All Be banned By The end Of The Month. LOL.  |
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Power Member
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I wouldn't mind. Brittie, you're this husband?!! LOL! I was thinking of Sabuntium actually, he's lucky his wife isn't like that woman.
Do all the good you can, in all the ways you can, as long as ever you can.
--John Wesley
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| Posts: 1504 | Location: Georgia | Registered: 12-22-2007 | |
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Power Member
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A special article for my friend Jakee and for all of us who had experienced heartaches at one point in time or another.When I broke up with my boyfriend of five years, I cried so hard that the skin on my nose started peeling from blowing it so much. I didn't cry on Valentine's Day, his birthday, or the other "big" occasions when I thought loneliness would set in. I cried at the tiniest things -- when I saw a monkey on TV that I knew he'd laugh at, or when I smelled a whiff of his sporty deodorant at Duane Reade. Of course people told me it would get easier with time -- and it did -- but what they didn't tell me was that it would get harder with time before it got easier. Every day that passed was marked. I'd think, "I can't believe this is the first Saturday without him as my date", or "How could 4 months have passed without us talking?" Breaking up is more than hard to do... it feels totally unnatural, counter-intuitive, and down-right unfair to stop talking to someone you're used to talking to daily.
Do all the good you can, in all the ways you can, as long as ever you can.
--John Wesley
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| Posts: 1504 | Location: Georgia | Registered: 12-22-2007 | |
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Power Member
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For girls only. 10 Love Lessons From '*** and the City' By Valerie Reiss Through my late 20s I was with the girls all the way, even though I often thought their romantic choices were misguided, obviously wrong, spiritually and psychologically clueless, superficial, selfish, and jaded. Pretty much like most of my own. But in a city where love can be as elusive as affordable housing, "*** and the City" gave so many of us perspective, validation, and reminders of the core lessons of love -- sometimes in spite of itself, sometimes in the scripts. With the ladies hitting the big screen, here's a bit of what I've learned, or remembered, about love thanks to Carrie and Co. 1. Single is Not a Dirty Word The SATC gals transformed "single"--"spinster"'s more evolved cousin--from being a hole to a presence; they made singledom cool. Even when it hurt. One of my favorite moments is when Carrie's silver Manolos get swiped from a smug-married's apartment and the friend refuses to reimburse her. She lectures Carrie about spending too much on shoes and not enough on family, playing right in to her singleton's shame. This, after Carrie has bought engagement, wedding, shower, and baby gifts for her. In a genius move, Carrie registers herself at Manolo Blahnik just for those shoes, single "bride" that she is, forcing the friend to pay up. To me this said the single life is just as valid as the married. We deserve as many gifts and even blessings from our friends and society, regardless of what others might think of our struggles and choices. 2. It's Okay to Expose All to Your Girlfriends Women talked about *** with their friends long before SATC. But the show gave us permission on a large scale to get graphic and detailed in cathartic and hilarious ways. It was like a six-season long Consciousness Raising group with better outfits. 3. Fate is Not Always Fate It's so tempting to interpret the tea leaves of love, to decide that fate is (finally) working in our favor. When Trey saved Charlotte from being mowed down by a speeding taxi, she decided it was fate. Not just that he was a nice guy who saved her life, but that he must be the guy to live out her "marry tale" with. Turns out--not so much, and I think after that divorce, Char developed a very different notion of fate, i.e.-we don't know how the universe works and just because it seems like synchronicity, it doesn't mean you have to marry the dude. A lesson better remembered than re-experienced. 4. Sometimes to Be Real You Have to Get Ugly When Charlotte first met her handsomely chiseled divorce lawyer, she kept to the prim, nice decorum that defined her. When she realized she needed to be fierce --and ugly-- to battle her Bunny-in-law, she dropped him for sweaty, obnoxious, bald Harry Goldenblatt and then felt free to be as nasty as she wanted to be, fangs and all. Turns out he found her "incredibly ****" anyway. And once she was able to shatter her preppy, WASPy notion of her ideal man, voila, there he was, right in front of her. 5. Be Vulnerable More than anyone else on the show, Samantha and her mien of steel taught us that true strength is in opening and trust. She started to get this from her girl-flame Maria ("I've got monogomy, I think I caught it from you people") but mostly from her hot-hot boyfriend Smith Jarrod. First, he forced on her his "perverse" desire to hold hands, and then, most touchingly, shaved off his golden locks when she lost hers to chemo. We all have an inner Samantha--the part that feigns bravado in the face of pain and trusts no one. Watching her set down her insecurity-as-sword reminded all us tough girls to do the same. 6. There's a Difference Between Childlike and Childish In perhaps my favorite episode, a guy named Wade had a comic book store, a great record collection, and a scooter. Carrie was justifiably wooed when he drew a cartoon of her telling her to call him. And the girl needed some fun! Mr. Big? ****, complicated, but no bag of jacks. With Wade, she played video games, took a spin on the scooter, got stoned on the balcony of his surprisingly vast Park Avenue apartment. Turned out the guy was living with his parents. And not only that, he lied to his mom that they were smoking Carrie's pot. Lesson? If he seems like a kid, investigate to make sure he's also an adult. 7. Know When to Kiss Goodbye Miranda asked a date up to her apartment. He declined, claiming to have "an early meeting." Later, she asked Carrie's man of the hour for insight. Berger said, "He's just not that into you," and "When a guy's really into you, he's coming upstairs, meeting or no meeting." Miranda is instantly liberated, giddy with the blame-free simplicity of it. Of course in real life, sadly, it's not always so simple. But through this and countless other moments, the show taught us that letting go is never easy--even when he's "not into you"--but that if you don't walk away when you know you should, only misery, over-analysis, and disappointment awaits. 8. Don't Mistake Scraps for Jewels "It was the single most encouraging moment in our relationship." Was Carrie talking about Big sharing his heart with her? Giving her a thoughtful present? Nope. She said this when he gave her the "only" extra pink toothbrush head one night. Sure, it was the only baby step toward accepting her into his life that he was capable of. But all of us need to love ourselves enough not to mistake glitter for diamonds, scraps for a meal--exactly what that toothbrush head was. 9. Read the Signs When Carrie got engaged to Aidan, she promptly strung the gorgeous Harry Winston ring around her neck instead of putting it on her finger. Score one for costume designer Patricia Field for the fresh accessory, minus one very big one for the happy future of Carrie and Aidan. Both continued to ignore the signs of doom--like so many of us do--in exchange for hope. It was a reminder to all of us not to ignore those persistent yet subtle doubts, accumulating red flags--and full-blown panic attacks--no matter how much we want something to work out. 10. Patience and Compromise Sure, the show was often about taking, and Goddess knows the characters' self-absorption grated horribly sometimes. But as the ladies matured, we saw more and more examples of selfless compromise. Miranda agreed to have her son Brady baptized even though it conflicted strongly with her beliefs; Charlotte converted to Judaism to be with Harry; and most hilariously, Harry put on underwear to sit on Charlotte's pristine white sofa. As for patience, the girls had a giant Birkin bag full of it for each other. And Carrie, in spite of herself had it big-time with Big. http://dating.personals.yahoo.com/singles/datingtips/pr...rmly24xkleXPjouIRpp4
Do all the good you can, in all the ways you can, as long as ever you can.
--John Wesley
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| Posts: 1504 | Location: Georgia | Registered: 12-22-2007 | |
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Men strike back! How many men does it take to open a beer? None. It should be opened when she brings it. ------------------------------------ ------------------------------- Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman? Because a woman who can't even afford a washing machine will probably never be able to support you. -------------------------------------------------------------------- Why do women have smaller feet than men? It's one of those 'evolutionary things' that allows them to stand closer to the kitchen sink. ------------------------------------------------------------------- How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart? When she starts a sentence with 'A man once told me...' ------------------------------------------------------------------- How do you fix a woman's watch? You don't. There is a clock on the oven. ------------------------------------------------------------------- If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first? The dog, of course. He'll shut up once you let him in. ------------------------------------------------------------------- I married a Miss Right. I just didn't know her first name was Always. ------------------------------------------------------------------- Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes a woman's *** drive by 90%. It's called a Weddin g Cake. ------------------------------------------------------------------- Why do men die before their wives? They want to. ------------------------------------------------------------------- Women will never be equal to men? until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are ****. ------------------------------------------------------------------- In the beginning, God created the earth and rested. Then God created Man and rested. Then God created Woman. Since then, neither God nor Man has rested!  |
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Power Member
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quote: Originally posted by Mrs. B.:
LOL!
I Am Still A Guy. LOL. Regardless Of How Great All Of You Are! LOL. |
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Frequent Member
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Do you know what is A B C D E F G??? A Boy Can Do Everything For Girl Now reverse the order,can anyone guess the full form of: G F E D C B A ??? . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Girls Forgets Everything Done & Catches(new) Boy Again...
Everything comes in circles ....... The old wheel turns, and the same spoke comes up. It's all been done before, and will be again.
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quote: Men strike back!
How many men does it take to open a beer?
None. It should be opened when she brings it.
Nope, Hubby opens my corona first, so he can have his miller.
------------------------------------ -------------------------------
Why is a Laundromat
a really bad place to pick up a woman?
Because a woman who can't even afford a washing machine will probably never be able to support you.
I got a brand new washer from hubby, and I made sure the next day I got a new dryer!
--------------------------------------------------------------------
Why do women have smaller feet than men?
It's one of those 'evolutionary things' that allows
them to stand closer to the kitchen sink.
Why do you think all shoe colors are only available on women's size?
-------------------------------------------------------------------
How do you know when
a woman is about to say something smart?
When she starts a sentence with 'A man once told me...'
Don't worry DC, Women always are a smart shoppers!
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How do you fix a woman's watch?
You don't. There is a clock on the oven.
Buy her a Rolex!
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If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first?
The dog, of course. He'll shut up once you let him in.
that only explains why men sometimes sleep on the couch!
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I married a Miss Right.
I just didn't know her first name was Always.
You always have to call us honey, or dear, or baby! Once you make a mistake callin us another name , you're in deep doo doo
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Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes
a woman's *** drive by 90%.
It's called a Weddin g Cake.
Wrong theory again, Marriage diminishes a woman "s" drive. Reason: There's always another day. The wedding cake is the bait!
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Why do men die before their wives?
They want to.
as long the insurance is enough. The wife is fine with it!
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Women will never be equal to men?
until they can walk down the street with a bald head
and a beer gut, and still think they are ****.
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In the beginning, God created the earth and rested.
Then God created Man and rested.
Then God created Woman.
Since then, neither God nor Man has rested!
So get back to work DC! lol |
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Mrs B, I myself watch the TV show alot!
I love the messages.
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Power Member
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quote: Originally posted by ALLFAIR:
Do you know what is A B C D E F G???
A Boy Can Do Everything For Girl
Now reverse the order,can anyone guess the full form of:
G F E D C B A ???
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Girls Forgets Everything Done & Catches(new) Boy Again...
Probably because the first boy wasn't treating her right? 
Do all the good you can, in all the ways you can, as long as ever you can.
--John Wesley
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