Yoly:

I think out of all who have responded, you take the cake. You have no heart...so how is it that you have the right to be so critical here?
You call it "boring"..but I can assure you it is the only way we can go about healing.
You Say we are claiming that the rest of the world is repsonsible...but we are actually saying that there are some very unsavoury characters out there who are responsible(and yes, you could meet one one day too)
You say that it is the same to say "move on" when someone has said "move out" to an alien. I ask....if divorce is the reason why we are all posting on this thread...we have been told to "move out" by our spouse, and now you are saying "move on" you are "boring" me with your "soap opera diatribe". So can you understand why you appear to be heartless and discompassionate?

Pasha:

No one faults you for looking ahead and antiicpating problesm down the road. That is using your brain...and fortunately for those of us who post the results of our deceit, you are getting firsthand knowledge upfront in order to use your brain. You should really think of it as a blessing that there are those of us, who are not filled with too much pride, to prevent us from declaring that we were indeed victimized. It helps to fuel your counter-attack, should you need one. It also has nothing to do with intelligence either. Tricksters and con-men know how to circumvent the most intelligent of the species... It is lie a statement made by the warden of a prison, when discussing with an architect how to go about building a more secure prison for the future... he said "while you, Mr. Architect are investing 8 hours a day coming up with a design to ensure security of the facility, each and every one of our "residents" are spending 24 hours a day coming up with ways to break it".

So, Pasha, no one said it was not a good idea to look into other options, what I said was that you are not criticized, chastized and abused by members of this board (a.k.a. Yoly) for not accepting the fact that your marriage dream may have ended your chances for staying in this country...and you are not being told to "get over it and move on"

I love how those who call this a Soap Opera are sitting at their computers all day drooling for the next post to come up. If you don't like it get the h e l l out! Just wait till it's your turn to cry, see who's laughing then.

Swiss,
You're right some comments are much worse than "tongue in cheek".

Yoly&Wayne
If you don't like what you're reading then why waste your time? Read other posts and skip this one or other threads started by Swiss. That should make your day go better. It's not a matter of "owning the country". How can it be wrong to want law abiding people with integrity to come to live here and NOT want people who are willing to do anything, stomping on whoever they want, using people for whatever purpose comes to mind, no matter what the cost to that person. We have enough citizen that fit that description, why deliberately add to it? And, by being a citizen we have the right to an opinion and to state it and to do whatever we can to support it. Do you have a problem with that?

Pasha
I wish you the best.

4now
Levity is always good and I think I took your post the way it was intended...

Josephine,
I love to read what you write, but I'm sorry if you're going through all that... I know exactly what you are talking about with the PTSD. I wonder if you ever truly recover from that. I've found that when I have a major thing happen it sets me back further than I was before. What happened to what doesn't kill you makes you stronger?

I'm glad that Swiss and others will post about their situations. It could very easily happen to a lot of other people. I know when I was contemplating marriage with someone I never even began to think about the possibilities. I'm thankful that he was honest with me and our close friendship has remained just that. These situations need to be made known so that people with their heads in the clouds will at least THINK.

Thanks Still!

There is no cure, it never goes away. Medication can alleviate the symptoms. The worst part is not being able to work, except in limited situations that never last.

My avatar (coffee cup pic) is ME! If you've watched South Park, I am like the character Tweak, without the coffee. Just one big bundle of nerves! I've paced the floor so much, I've worn out carpets. I avoid sleep at all costs because of the nightmares.

Please forgive me if I seem to have no sense of humor. There is nothing funny about a broken heart.

Swiss Nut:
I think you should work on The Comedy channel or maybe you do already.
I have never criticized, and/or abused you or any other members of this board. But there you go again blaming others. That's not my style. 4now made a joke and we replied.
If you check again my posts I decided not to answer you no more just because when I or any other member disagree with you, you start expressing your doubts about "the
intelligence of others".
I do not have to realize that my marriage dream may have ended my chances for staying in this country. I do still happily married and just I do know " s h i t happens" but for now that's not my case. It hasn't stopped me for feel sorry for others that are going through that painful process but I don't believe you or others have the right to invade the forum with your very personal issues which have gone far beyond already from "immigration issues".
Also you said I have no heart but I did have relationships before where people play me and I
didn't expend my days worrying what was going to happen to them in any ways. As a matter of the fact I wish them the best, because that may me feel good about life and simply made me fell better as a person.
You are fighting here with everybody. But ok you have the right to fight is that is what you want so I do have the right to said that all your crying is getting exhausting and just boring.
Pretty much everybody has gave you answers to your problem and said they are sorry and bla bla bla but you just keep going around and around in circles. Oh Lord and I know you are going to answer to this post and blame and said who know how many things about me and others in this thread. Well I'm going to try very hard not to reply to you I was doing so and my last answer weren't adressed to you at all. But obviously attacking and doubting about others intelligence and compassion is becoming the highlights of your days. So ok keep going.
God bless you ONCE AGAIN.

Still Learning:
You don't know me at all or have any idea what kind of person I am. I disagree with everything illegal. I have never overstay in this country or being out of status and just so you know no I don't support or agree with "anything" illegal.
So I don't know what are you talking about dear.
About me leaving this thread?, excuse me that is entirely my choice.
Have a great day.

[This message was edited by Yoly&Wayne on November 05, 2003 at 01:28 PM.]

I don't mind being called on to the carpet for an honest mistake, so I will take the time to respond to your comment and clarify my statement b/c after re reading my comment myself I could see where I could come off a bit selfish and elitist.

My comment: "If you took offense to my posting about the BCIS revisiting their old standards with physically visiting the homes of USC/Aliens then perhaps you need to readdress your intentions and move back to your home country and try to openly express yourself as your have here. You forget yourself as a guest in my home when you will not allow a voice from the opposition to be heard. You enjoy these rights b/c of others who sacrificed. So tongue and cheek get over it and allow both USC and Alien spouses to run posts that help their situations.

Your response: We can't say "move on" but you guys can say "move out".

I meant to convey that you probably would not have the same rights to express your thoughts or concerns in so many ways the same way in your own country as your have here in the USA.

I've read many plight/soap opera situations covering Deportation, Sponsorship, Green card, Forms to file etc etc,. Message boards if you haven't forgotten are a tool and is for all to use.

I'm off the soapbox ... Have a great day

Oh those sleepless nights. I hate that. I never had a problem sleeping before. You know what's wierd ? I have girls sleep over just to sleep because that made me sleep better even without ***. I take Ambien sometimes. Then I feel like I aged so much as well and lost hair. Can you imagine that ? All those years I never worried. People used to wonder why I never let things bother me and I would just say that nothing is worth ruining your health over. I was 36 when we met and she was 21 to answer peoples questions. We married a year later and divorced 2 years after that; seperated 2 months after she got the green card in the mail and divorc was final 4 months later.
I used to spend the entire night feeling embarrassed at being used. I felt humiliated even though no one else was there. And very much alone. No one wanted to hear this. Tsk tsk what ashame people would say. But does anyone really know the physicall and emotional trauma that this caused ? You lose trust in everyone and everything including yourself. How can you trust yourself to make ANY decision when you made such a bad mistake. And you go over all the warning signs you missed and swear that you will never miss them again. Something good has to come out of something bad; right ? What possible good could come out of it ? To become paranoid ? The divorce gave no satisfaction. The fraud lawsuit gave some. Got some financial reimbursement for some of the lies. Yet you can't get back for the emotional damage done. But you wonder. You think. You plot. But there is no way. But your body responds where your mind can not. So how do we get to sleep again ?

Yoly:

Your insults have gone too far.. You say you have never criticized me....look again at your posts...first I was an alien in diguise, then I am a melodramatic soap opera person, then I should belong to the broken heart club, I am someone who cannot stop justifying my opinions, well, indeed that is my prerogative, and now I belong on comedy channel. AND FOR YOUR IMFORMATOIN....if you are going to quote, then PLEASE DO IT ACCURATELY. I said in one of my earlier posts, that I don;t back oof a point, as you had accused me of doing, but that "I CHOOSE NOT TO CHALLENGE THE INTELLIGENCE OF OTHERS". That means, YOLY, that if I am not sure, I don't continue a point, just in case I am speaking to someone who knows more.

Instead of repeating my words, accurately, or indeed cutting and pasting them in like most people do, you converted my statement from "I choose not to challenge the intelligence of others" into "i doubt about the inteligence of other" Now, in my native language, there is a vast difference in those 2 statements!!

Then you go ****her and decide that it is your obligation to remind me not only to remember that I am a naturalized citizen (don't need you to remind me, I am perfectly aware, thank you) but also where I came from. Do you know where I came from Yoly? If you do...please tell me, just in case I have forgotten, because as you so succintly mentioned " if there is no more room, (I am presuming in my small brain, that is) to remember where I came from". To answer that question...I came from my mother's womb...just where you came from too. Now. we're equal.


As far as your marital bliss is concerned...lucky you...but I felt that way myself about 2 years ago. So, hopefully the same wont happen to you. But as you write ..."It hasn't stopped me for feel sorry for others that are going through that painful process but I don't believe you or others have the right to invade the forum with your very personal issues which have gone far beyond already from "immigration issues".
Really...I would think that commentary on my mental health and what clubs I should belong to and such is also nothing to do with


Once again. where do you hear me crying? Where on this board have I shared my metions...othern than in the beginning when I was explaining my sorrow over my broken marriage?

I'd like an answer please.

Yoly:

"I do have the right to said that all your crying is getting exhausting and just boring."

Wrong! If it bores you, exhausts you, DON'T READ IT AND DON'T COMMENT ON IT!

We're here to help and learn. No poster should have to bear a personal attack, whether direct, implied, or joking around.

Mike: I wasn't refering to your comment. To be honest I'm not even familiar with your situation or your posts.

Michael:
I really liked your last comment.

I'm not even going to read it.

God bless you once again.

I will keep around if I feel like it....whether you like it or not. It is once again entirely up to me.

Kisses to all of you!!!

Michael ...try this for sleep

Tape a kidney bean to the inside of your right wrist, 3 finger widths below the crease of your wrist. Try it tonight and see if you can stay awake. cheaper than Ambien

Thats a sleep cure.. but then again thats not what ur talking about is it.. Time, Michael..A LONG time . That will be the cure.. but while ur waiting a few amino acid supplements wouldnt hurt either to speed up the process. Hang in there

Yoly&Wayne
The following is part of what I was referring to when making my statement about not wanting people with no ethics, etc. to move here: ""Now when you guys believe you are the owner of the "country" and believe you can determine who should leave...then that really sounds "selfish and not very democratic really"."" Was that YOUR statement or quotes from someone else? As far as leaving the thread, I mentioned that for your own mental health as you have made several criticisms of it. By the way, it doesn't matter to me if you post or don't post and of course you have that right. This is America. Also, I think someone mentioned "glass houses". We ALL need to remember it COULD be us. I'm glad that your situation is working out so nicely. Hopefully that will continue. But, there is no guarantee. By the way, God bless you too.

Still learning:
To your question about if that was my statement? Yes that was my statement. I'm sorry for the quotations. I see that brought up some missunderstanding. I will try to pay more attention to it.
About me choosing or not to read for my own mental health. I never said that I was becoming c r a z z y because of it.
Glass houses??? yes I do know that. But I also said that I don't forget s h i t may happens.
I know there is no guarantee but for now I'm enjoying myself. I don't think there is nothing wrong with it either. I will not say it though no more because I do not want to become repetitive.
Thank you for the bless. Is always good to wish good things to others.

[This message was edited by Yoly&Wayne on November 05, 2003 at 02:36 PM.]

sorry to break up the tension guys. but im just loooool on the floor now becuase i cant get rid of the advertising pop ups that I am now getting because of my response to Michael. They are all for Advertising AMBIEN... one for SONATA and all kinds of sleep aids. I wonder what will happen if I type VIAGRA. Ill keep u posted.

Hahahah.....4now
That is funny. I hope you can get rid of those annoying pop ups.

Yoly:

I notice that you "backed off" and decided not to answer my question. I guess some of us can dish it out but can't take it.
Anyway, your attitude on this board is quite out of line. Your posts sound condescending and sarcastic, not only to lowly, "naturalized citizen me" but ot others as well.

Now, I know where my anger comes from, but seeing as all is currently "going your way" rught now, I am wondering where your's is coming from?

Michael;

I am sure I have looked far enough, and Im having difficulty finding the thread where you mention the fraud case you achieved satisfactionin, for sake of the relentless posts of mud slinging here, but can you direct me to your story.

I went to see my atty yesterday, with the express intent of filing a suit for the fraud with my spouse and his Mistress, and my atty had to think about how to proceed. Wondering if you have any info which may be of help to me.

Many thanks and by the way...your post about the impact that learning that your "closest and dearest" partner has done to you, really hit home with me. Yes, I too am aged beyond my years because of this and the paranoia you refer to is VERY REAL.

yoly&Wayne

Was that a double entendre?? looooooooooool

ok Im out. gonna catch Matrix3

have a good nite everyone